Audiovisual Cultures episode 117 – Paula Checks In

Show notes

Host Paula Blair reflects on four years of making the podcast, the writing projects she’s been working on so far this year, and some decisions about the podcast going forward.

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Music: commonGround by airtone (c) copyright 2018 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license.


Edited by Paula Blair with Audacity.

Recorded with Zencastr on 7 April 2022.

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Automated Transcript

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hello and welcome to you what do you facial cultures the podcast that makes it different Terry is a film arts and media and their significance and culture I am your host Paula Blair and in this episode I’d like to take stock and Chuck T. up by where were asked with this show and some of the things I’ve been working on so far in twenty twenty to you because I’ve been doing quite a lot of writing and not so much recording but the store and get stuck in I wanna give my deepest thanks to our incredible patrons out pastry on dot com forward slash AP cultures and you’re not already won over patrons and you’re interested in accessing exclusive bonus content such as C. unedited video recordings of interviews has made during these constructions and things I take radios or other kinds of Baxter is that I paid I just for patrons at different tiers to go and check right the tears and see what’s on offer even if you join a to pay what you count here you can joins from one point or one dollar amounts for example and you can be on not tear you can be on any tear and pay more than the asking price for that tear I think that’s just a minimum and you can she sped up if you really want Hey but even just at the lowest here you’ll get early access to these episodes you know you get the machine days before everybody else can they send either MPG on directly or through your own dedicated RSS feeds for our patients already he should have access to those if you’re not accessing those new having problems without to sent me knowing this I don’t know if there’s a problem if somebody doesn’t tell me so the link for our peach tree and is also in the show notes but it’s that quick if you just J. Petri on dot com forward slash AP culture share find us and also if you look at our websites audio visual cultures dot com so when Marge hello Ricky S. you’ll be able to find all of those thanks as well as the full show notes transcripts and lots more information and you can also donate it directly in various ways in the website if you use pay pal if you got money in your PayPal and it’s weighing heavily in your pay pal kind I’ll happily take some of it off your hands for you those are nice ways to support and thank you for anything you do you already but I must say thanks as well to those if he he engaged on social media our Instagram is taking off I think just right at the end of March we had four hundred followers so it was quite exciting that’s the most followers the podcast is hot on any social media I give up really with the FIA spec for awhile I mostly used to face spec see you know use the matter saying because it’s connected to Instagram as well so I use it to shed chill posts and stories and stuff this doesn’t always work which is annoying but you know it’s a free service so the fees spec I think really just a day before a recording this the Facebook page I don’t know it started telling me to update it or something I was clicking all the no buttons and it did not saying where and no buttons that they became a yes without me realising and it updated to PH I have more followers than there were lakes on that night all of all of those are gone I don’t know I don’t understand Instagram is fun Twitter was the one I cook it acts and then it became a trash fire but say hello on Twitter as well because I am ready axis for the podcast at least on Twitter thanks for people he recharged on those we have had some of the comments I’m Startin to retaliate night every the start of every episode I’m read nights we’ve had so many nice feedback from somebody who spend less than I’ve started putting these honest testimonials on our web page as well so if you go to the home page of our website if you keep scrolling down to the bottom you’ll see the most recent testimonials posted there and I’m working my way Siri giving somebody a shot a night for locks I really appreciate it this means a lot of the people are listening and it’s lovely to hear thought because I I suppose I wanted to build a community with this but you know I’m an introvert and all sorts of other things you know and probably a bit of a mess some troop as well so I’m not very gate assets being central to community but I’d like to have community it’s a weird one I know %HESITATION anyway so I had some really lovely comments from Dr Fiona noble he guested on the show and episode one hundred and four please have a listen to a lot of heat Mr S. R. you’ve joined us and Stan or you know it fell off your radar it’s a really lovely conversations you and I are good friends so there is a bit of %HESITATION terror and stuff as well and very cheeky with farmer checking with her than I am with a lot of other casts because usually casts are strangers or people I’ve never met before words soon and I have known each other a good number of years nine and I can be checking back by myself Sir when I when I say cheeky I mean B. mice how hopeful so that the suit is about her research on contemporary Spanish cinema and language teaching on the twenty eighth of January this year beyond that kindly tweet ads and I quote my brilliant friend Pete Blair creates the podcast audio visual cultures AV cultures pods this week’s episode is an absolute traits super important conversation with Damian Taylor right privilege and the patriarchy among lots of other interesting topics highly recommends to the exclamation points thank you Fiona this kind of feedback really G. suite on an ice I say so I started linking these comments on our website or deep tissue cultures dot com so if you don’t select a choice in the show or on the home page let people know that you’re testing let me know that you’re not saying you can email the official cultures at G. email dot com or you know get in touch in any of these ways just love to hear from you end up to hear about what’s working and what you want to hear more of really interested in constructive feedback because I want this show to be useful it’s not just me making friends on the internet but just sometimes is felt like for the past couple of years this is not a bad thing for an introvert it’s the past one of the best places to meet you nice friends it’s the internat but it’s also quite a scary place because I know you’re dying for an up to yes the last time I checked the United States I stood Belgium for the top spot in our listener league table I know him ever should be next so just how low term Merican France and so glad that you’re listening it’s great to have you as well right suit and other seat back I had recently the listener explains that they find themselves listening to the cast I’m not so grounds but then some saying the gases said Coles something to mind for me and I start talking about it but because I tend not to want to take up too much space and I worry that I’m talking too much and you don’t need me to tell you I go off on tangents because I’m trying to avoid all of the last we tend to spade three what I’m saying you know the anecdote that I’m saying because she she off the cuff fits on plans in the discussion and I just wanna get back to the gas as soon as possible and hopefully points off each other as a conversation but the Leicester told me it seems that I have interesting stuff to say and they wanted to hear more of thought so boys Adair are you can’t not today you’re gonna get so much she’ll ask me never to cheat again this made me take a bit of pause because AVC wasn’t always primarily an interview show a lot of you may have just joined in the past couple of years she may not have bothered going box three the archive about the salutes you know this is an absolute a hundred seventeen so there’s been a lot over the past few years so making this mostly pay visits she being an interview show as more of a default during the pandemic before then I was interviewing people and person but I eat me and a lot of episodes wastes doctor Andriy she’ll he was more of a co host for the first two years because even when we did interview people we did together once the lock signs began in March twenty twenty certainly here in the U. K. Andries workloads as a senior lecturer at the university completely explodes I suppose just set the notes T. any of he he he might as Shane dot urine university staff had an easy ride if things when working from home had to happen I can tell you as a witness that he is already far too heavy workloads more than doubled and wastes no support only pressure from his employer and at the time when the freshman until Oct nine there were strike actions happening so these people already had a lock is good well last but because of this global catastrophe that was unfolding people for the most part I think really knuckled sign and did what they could for their students and just try to keep themselves afloat as I was planning notes for this recording beginning back in March of twenty twenty two eighty so two years later there is ongoing strike action from the university and colleges union in the United Kingdom and it’s just this one as she waits on the list of harmful practices that the unions fighting against so I’m not going to go into details of that case it’s not my fight but it’s a fight that I support and I have solidarity for I didn’t survive thought system I am a consultation thought system and I have the utmost empathy and sympathy for anyone who’s in the fray and it’s going straight at the moment just sort of laying out some information and it’s just flashing a bit more contacts about this business of the show because this is really what we’re talking about right now it’s just a bit of a a spike off the narrative but back to this notion of taking up space and I’m sure it was in an episode of I lay waste to me that you mail which focused site really loves become recall which apps Suter hit when she was talking to you but she and her cast we’re talking about taking up the space which is quite a feminist auction on its auction I’ve been hearing about it for years as well on the guilty feminist podcast but this time it was pointed out right not to take up space is to make space and by default that’s what making a podcast does you know it just comes to my mind it might not even have been highway it might have been on a podcast colds toxic leadership where somebody said test it was one of those to depose accent podcasts that I highly recommend to greet you if you’re struggling with your mental health in any way or any of that they’re very pro dating without sort of stuff and having no she invited you know so I I really recommend them but anyway it was one of those where somebody like this and I’ve never really heard that before where she take up space means you’re making space yes and not speech you taking up you can share with people and I think that by default that’s what making a podcast does you make space for yourself you know you take up some space sorry there on unique space and you know especially when you invite other people on it and I think people have sent this to me before and I don’t think I took enough notice of it but when you have guests on your podcast it means that you share that space that you take can you know when I sank and more recently in the past couple of years and giving more of that space over to other people I have probably for call on the bed it by myself and I’ve hidden behind not quite a lot you know where I’m going to get this great person they have lots of stuff to say and I’m never going to get me I’m a great person I have stuff to say it’s very narcissistic but in a way it’s cherry you know I got stuff to say I’ve got ideas and might bring in I started the podcast because I had compiled loads of academic work and research on these areas of arts and culture and things like costs and have a lot to say about them but %HESITATION so %HESITATION because my interests are much more wide ranging than just this specific research interests I how does the market dynamic and I wanted to explore those and start to demonstrate hi you know the things that we T. two ladder box things and categorize salmon institutionalize some eyes and always helpful and it’s probably not a bad idea she made a surprise things be open mind debts you know and to recognize that there should be a joyous and dots borders don’t have to be fixed I can be perforated they can the lands and melds and slip and slide and all those sorts of analogies all of this is related to a more general time of introspection for me I feel that I’ve come a long way mentally and the past few months and years on a freak and focus and determination I’m feeling clearer on what I want to stay with my life and I’ve been taking action towards trying to make that happen so it’s hard to pinpoint exactly when this began because all our lives were in a state of the coming but I’d say that it’s rooted in a decision I made it and summer twenty twenty one so nearly a year ago from recording this I’m not was to take a break from my volunteer work with an incredible charity here in the north east of England’s cold action language whose mission is to supply free English lessons to displaced people seeking asylum anti have refugee status in the U. K. I had been a volunteer teaching and administrative assistants with them for three and a half years of dot points it’s interesting because even sense writing these notes and my user rang up by eight which is a great north English word my user rang I learned that one in Lancaster I’ve been monitoring it bites whether to join this charities action finding mission their parent charities team for the great north run this year it since September it’s how it’s currently is the world’s biggest half marathon I mean it’s the same size as any other half marathon because to half marathon but it’s a big deal Andrea my partner he is often on the show he is a massive fan he’s run it twice now he ran it last year he loves a half marathon he really does he got on and the pilots for this year and good friend of mine who told me she really wanted to do it again and she really wanted to work on our fitness and use it as an excuse to work on our fitness again I told her bite the charity place since the auction fine dition still highs and she’d gotten touch with them straight away and I am still undecided I mean I think it’s something I really want to date but it’s more money up front something I’m quite anxious about it and then probably resourcing up anyway it’s gone in a massive tangent there it’s a charity that’s very much and my heart recording this as well when the war is that Russia has started in Ukraine as ranching and things are terrible I think it’s broke broader awareness of what’s going on waste displaced people people who are displaced by violence and war in their home country and this is something I’ve cared about it for a really long time I will point out that I am frustrated that there are a lot of people you only seem to care now that it’s happening to white people and our European neighbours but this has been actively happening for a really long time and a lot of other places on our countries have a lot to do with fact you know in middle eastern countries and north African countries and some sites American countries is vile you know the global seis the global north has a lot to answer for but now that some saying there’s a crisis in the global Norse on its people who look more like me stocks and I initiate you know that’s something that’s bothering me a lot and so you know it’s on my mind that I want to help this charity so in some way that has been doing really incredible work for years with people from all over and I always felt that with the language assistance you know and that just a few hours a week I used today and three o’clock trying to reaching lessons of raising him and it was tiring and I was quite dependable and I think I felt really guilty because hello I’m Noah my freelance work really seriously dried up over the whole lock sign and it has not recovered I’m still in a really privileged position compared to so many people so I think I felt a lot of guilt by thought for a long time and I think I was volunteering for a long time because I felt guilty and I wasn’t ready taking enough time to address my own health problems you know when I was assisting with language classes you know I really enjoyed the administrative stuff because I used to help people and roll and it was fun because there were times when I would get to use a bit of my Spanish I have a little bit of Spanish I’m a bite sized in spots but things like in the registration form arts just stuff like your age where you went to school so in your name stuff like that those are the sorts of basic things I can say and are saying enough that it can be communicable you know I always felt that that wasn’t much of a contribution in the grand scheme of things it’s not it’s peddling upholding human rights and attaining social justice are major concerns for me and I feel rather helpless ending anything up by any of those things just a bite all of the time I mean the thing I do the most as I have my M. P. tortured my member of parliament held her up Sydney tortured I’m never done right into her butt stuff I’m not sure where my skills Larry I am not skills that’s going in doing demonstrations in the city centre I just have so much social lines already and sensory overstimulation dot com briefly cope with those sorts of situations even when they’re very far he piled but my goodness I can write a letter so that’s just where my skills lie and you know the revelation needs people of all kinds I think if you doing some saying that’s the saying is net I always felt the exclusivist date a little bit of saying the brigade dot then everything would have praise you know just from everybody taken a tiny bit about her then it would have praise for most people and I realized then that the weed tiny bet IV stand was a lot more than many other states maybe in their whole lives I’m not to sin mean anything special and I am absolutely not passing judgment on anyone I’m just telling a blunt trace you know I’m not somebody who has a dose of money I don’t have expendable income so it’s difficult for me to just give money to charity at the moment but when I had free time I mocked and then I did some hang on it was something I felt able to day in time I felt able to cast on there a lot of people he had more time than that and don’t give it or if they have better social skills and I day and don’t use them and so what I’m not that’s not a judgment I’m not saying you should be ashamed absolutely not no it’s a great choice and I think being brutally honest was I doing what I did it’s because I felt guilty because I felt she M. at being a working class person he wrote he was no longer able to work and find themselves unable to work and structures such environments you I think I pulled back a bit because I had to address that stuff and that is what I’ve been doing a lot of in the past few months you know some I’m not passing judgment on any of us I told nobody should be carrying any shame about that because life is difficult and we never know what he’s going to be surrounded us next I mean I get a bit frustrated when I hear or I read people saying I wish I could see some saying that even they never asked if we find something that day to day or maybe they’ll offer a prayer and the only acceptable response a lot is and I cook from sister Michael and Derry girls sure what could be done today even if it feels menace skill there is some saying that each of us can J. and I feel like it’s I suppose it’s quite a socialist idea that if we all pitch in a tiny bit then I’ll be Daddy’s say Cassell told mark okay John I think that’s probably that’s a severity S. nous when we’ve got so many billionaires and multi millionaires in the worlds of all the money and the rest of us have so little of the rest of the money it’s a tricky one last night you know I mean if they give a lot that’s still small change for them you know so I recognized I hope you know what I mean and that the very least you know it’s coming from a good place coming from a caring place even if I’m searching I am saying in what became difficult for me by following straight on this decisive action you know and I I think it was decisive action and then I’ll explain why ticket shortly you know and if the more detailed but also you know it was last August when the Taliban control of Afghanistan and I mean I do even perceive that today take control said the United States hundred box of them I don’t know where the line is there but the role lose extra people who were fleeing for their C. Este ends you know it was really tough to stand by the decision I had already managed a top point because the language lessons they’re not just a by learning English it’s a bite community it’s about getting to grips with different accents and I’m quite useful for that having a different accent and a place where actually I mean to be honest %HESITATION somebody nice memories of my volunteer worker a lot of the students responding to me while because they could understand me better than they could understand locals announced people with the Geordie accents I get an extra like I’m an alien over here all the time because people don’t understand what I’m saying and I try and unseat properly the way I am staying here I try and separate every word and I speak slowly when I’m in bustle speed up and I’ll talk but more like this but when I’m here in England which is where I am all the time at the minute right do you tend to speak so late because you even English people don’t always understand that’s people with the same language so imagine what it’s like for people here Sharon and Jack come trade will have maybe had to fight to get into a country where the B. a better safer than other countries where they are supposed to be C. S. ions they don’t know the language you know it’s terrifying it’s so scary I mean it’s stressful enough having a different accents but speaking the language you know it’s so unimaginably tough and for a lot of people it was just fine tonight the classes were but finding out how things work culturally socially and practically unseen friendly faces and making new friends and nothing ever previous from trauma and being able to laugh and smile and find joy and comfort for me beat it might have been only those couple of hours a week and the class I’m serious you know people are have been tough tough times you know I met people he had been trafficked I met people who you call traversed desert’s and sees check out there you young man for him it was killer be killed people have gone through awful awful sayings and then to to be able to turn up to a class and feel pride in yourself when you’ve worked really hard and you’ve done well and you’re missing your family desperately and you may be stuck in the shop the hotel room and you’re not allowed to work and you you get these few times a week you have to level for a whole week and everything’s really expensive and you don’t know who to ask for the fate that you might needs everything’s on familiar she I mean it’s so it’s so scary you know so I thought I did I felt a lot of guilds arenas for quite awhile that Justin Howell St I mean what I decided to Jay was I felt like I was out in crocs waste my mental well being you know I feel like I’ve done really well and a lot of the pandemic was probably strangely good for me because it meant that I could see a star in a lot of stuff that was dragging on and on and on you know and I was getting and trace of salts and intrusive memories you know I was diagnosed with PTSD and I had some treatment for last year which I had to guess rich hardy and I did it online it was typing who’s all three instant messaging rather than speaking which was actually quite interesting for me because I find that because I’m a better writer than I am a speaker maybe you notice the difference between when I’m resting like I am right night and when I’m reading notes you if I go off piste it’s going to be a bit more all over the place sun pausing in things anyway so I felt really fortunate to have had that opportunity and I took an opportunity and grasped it with both hands because I’m so determined to be while and to make a proper laughing and I really need to sort myself or you know I’m in my late thirties I’m too young to wallow I’m too young we just waste away you know and I I love doing this podcast if I could make a joke out of doing this sort of four K. weights but at the moment it’s from the kindness of a few friends that I get anything from other told you that’s quite tough actually when you work really hard on it and you know it’s your B. F. A. N. G. in archer AT and t’s Jerry thanks for it the work so hard in it and not really people aren’t necessary people are taking notice and I mean it’s it’s hard to feel worse and not when you don’t know really competing rights but you’re on platforms that are dominated by people who have millions of tiny notes you know I am not a purple icing there and I’m being serious when I say that user celebrity podcasts that have millions of tiny notes there’s no way I can ever dream T. at T. M. dot I barely have a hundreds die notes and every episodes the weekend comes sites but on the C. every individual lesson I appreciate I appreciate yeah I appreciate you hearing less and I’m sticking with made it’s a really important to get that perspective that the quality really matters you know so I’m trying my best with it but I don’t I just can’t make a living off of our toll toll so you know I need to be realistic about that and in my heart of hearts I’m a writer and so that’s what I’ve been focusing on the past while and I think I moved away from seeing my volunteering because I just needed to be at my house really finally over the finish line and complete that really hard work of getting well well enough to work you know in a structured workplace again as well as I think to really make a concerted effort at applying for jobs but I think I’m being more specific and we’re in the Pine C. salute we’ll get on to that sort of thing night yes I’ve been applying the fairly solidly for things for a few months night but of course keeping the podcast going to you so you might be aware if you’re a regular listener you might be aware that in January I had an obsolete just floods of recordings he did lose your recordings I participated and the slacks radio residency at new bridge project acts here in new castle and I made three recordings for that and everybody involved was really kind enough to see not me use the field recordings of those four podcast episodes you know when one of them in particular was you know more than twice as long as I can actually fit into their residency slots so that was really great to have those episodes coming out of that too so that meant you know three episodes which is six weeks for me because it’s every other weapons thank you know so I had everything shed jobs right at the end of April the comment in January I call really quite burnt diets I think it was just a lot of talking to strangers you know it was a lot of hustling and it was a lot of very quickly getting up to speed with people I’ve never spoken to before or you know hadn’t spoken to for a long time or I knew who they were and they didn’t know me I think the first recording I did J. for it was actually with a good friends with tech he you might no no I thought definitely helped but all the other recordings a date we’re based people he either had never spoken to before we actually recorded it Bower he I knew me and they probably would vaguely recognize me but not necessarily so anyway so after such a busy January I struggle to know what to do with myself in February I just knew that I was burnt site and I had a bit of grace from the podcast say turns matchmaker dot FM office as a safe and actively applying for jobs and not actually getting anywhere and I find it tough ways little money coming in to know what to focus on next because I’ve cults who many projects that are partially done there at all at various stages I just couldn’t decide right what should I jump and see again what should I fire up what should I try to complete I just find it really difficult to decide because you know I had all these questions such as what has the best chance of being published and if it gets published well it’s L. O. R. what can I focus on the best way to make and it means ten and trusts and what might actually purchase some income you know if I managed to write a back kind of get it with the more popular press and then I’ll actually get some royalties for something of published quite a lot of last year not just with charities but I was volunteering my time see quite a few different things and I have been doing that for years and I think I called tip pooling as well where I was I’ve just become really wary of working for freight I’m tired of that I am worst a lot hello two kids and I’m a really hard conscientious worker never mind all that expertise and experience I can bring to some saying and I’m so tired of working for free I am not independently while Sadie and anyway he I have been freeloading off my partner for five years all of these anxieties came to a head for me N. late January early February this year and I resolved to see really several of the sites I perked up a bit when I reached out to my very dear friend John H. he spoke to me for episode seventy one up by eight PM update projects please see check this site if you haven’t already it’s a really lovely episode again about like Fiona she was my longest serving friends we’ve known each other for twenty years twenty five years well Michael others realize how old I am we’ve got a really good reporter probably too good because you know we make virgin that he was speaking in ways that no one else will understand because you know teenage girls the attack on it it’s a really lovely episodes yeah we had to catch up when I was on my own for a few days you know it was a really fun catch up and Joe told me up by an exhibition she was pulling together appoint neon house Lakhani’s night I’m not gonna go through explaining what all this is because I’ve had some links in the show notes where you can find out more about your wanna and bending glass her expression at you know that’ll explain if you’re interested they’ll explain what house okay says and why this is a big deal as we talked I became increasingly fascinated by everything she was telling me in particular the history of neon thank god for me sort of a neon before and it’s on the C. it’s so fascinating and I and I really want to share what you the research that I’ve done in this no I thought as well as the old Ulster television studios and archives you were talking and talking about the S. I was getting really really interested and having ideas about it and said you asked me if I’d be interested in writing something and I agree to this before I was even offered a faith because it was just so interesting which is probably partly by a don’t get paid enough for staff because I’m just like yes science grant that step you but I just had to know more about this site I just caught the bug you know I was a betting inspired by another saying I’d caught a bug for in the house now Conaway told I was really inspired by the kites taxed written by Amy Corey for demand Hearst’s major exhibition treasures from the wreck of the unbelievable and I suggested writing a small exhibition guides that we teach her three depending glass show and the works an engagement with the works not explain them but just engage with any of the adjacent to them you while also giving just some information that might be useful might be enlightening might be interesting and it was intended to be a company rather than prescribed right Texas what this means and this is how you should feel the protests in the next room you should feel less and no I’m not interested in that kind of art writing I I wanted to be a J. Simba Staten Joe very kindly said that she considered me to be one of the artists and that this was one of the pieces of work in the exhibition you know and I was really excited about that I so enjoy the process of researching and writing they sit just fired me up completely and then it gives me that excitement for engaging with arch technology crossed that the treasures exhibition had done nearly five years ago so as I came to a head more opportunities to apply for camera I feel like we’re not done with neon it’s time of recording this there’s actually still quite a bit today because you know that thing that I was commissioned to J. it’s all done but you know I was also writing an essay about that and then I could abandon because all this other stuff kept coming up and %HESITATION I haven’t as yet managed to the get back to it because these other things became urgent where is the neon is no I in and trust that I want today something less you know so it’s not tricky thing not freelancers thing as well I’ve been offered money to do that S. or their socks all to play for and they have to take priority just because I ain’t got no money coming in so I had some interactions that I actually felt finer points because they ruled things alright and I started to feel more like thoughts of bites things I was applying for you know there were a few things I applied for and I knew he didn’t meet the criteria and certainly not in the way that the organization was intending so I knew I was a wild cards you know I it was just one of those right just so you know what you just have to try because you’re not in it you can’t win it it was one of those where you one hundred percent won’t get tested you don’t apply for it and it could be life changing if you didn’t get it so there’s no reason not to try so I’ve been working under that other change for quite awhile I was getting projections for the so we’re not a surprise and some of them were written very nicely and not actually always hopes when you any char person as naxal human I’m not just an automated message that same year I didn’t get the job can give you feedback by when it’s not just humans saying really appreciate you taking the time to research and you’re right so possibly it by you’re interested in this job you know we can’t sure yet this year this time but you know we hope you’ll apply for stuff again you know that kind of thing is just really meaningful to acknowledge that somebody took time out of their life to really research and he considers and why they’d be a great employee for you you know and I think that needs to happen more and I’m ready done let’s all these places that just go well we had you know so many applicants will what does that mean did you have fifty or did you have two hundred and fifty because what’s too many worst top line where you’re not going to give somebody feedback you know you’re not gonna let me know that I’ve been knocked out of the running by an algorithm and not a human type of buyer a lot of my anxiety then in February was really in deciding again what to do next and knowing that certain things couldn’t happen actually helps clear the fog I was like well I tried okay so I’m done I I did the best I could do there it’s no go so that’s actually rose something like that’s gates I can try and focus new it’s still something all right second nine narrow the focus on to something that might work and spurred on by these few redactions I the rush died in up to cation C. arts council England’s developing your creative practice grounds apart which I’m waiting to hear even when this episode really says I still want her Jack so you it’s a ten week process to me unless I just feel really places myself for just getting in because just taking one of these applications just getting it through the ground TM submission system it’s nothing short of combative so anyone who just gets three dot sight system and gets through the eligibility checks your hero because it’s tough it’s really tough they don’t make it easy for people even when you’re as prepared as you can possibly be that’s a really painful very long process you know there’s a lot of job application site and for and it’s you may be spending ages fashion are your documents and stuff but then the actual submission ace to stop the not so loud and and then BAM twenty minutes grounds capitate race this was a whole morning you starting quite early in the morning and you know and finishing quietly at all on the day before because you know that cut off is at nine and I just thought what if what if so I did that the day before it’s not an easy process today so I just thought well up to the chief minister south just having made any supplication and is something to be proud of this year you know because I find the thought to my document when I A. I tried to design a proposal for a project grounds and that’s a much Baker grounds and it’s a much more unwieldy based I was aiming to suppress that early in twenty twenty one and the process of it just utterly broke me I thought I was really prepared I’ve been the weapon are shite read all the guidance I’ve done all the stuff you know as much as I did prepare for it I was not prepared for hits you may as well the flung me against a wall on the site but I was mentally prepared for this time I knew what to expect and it’s a much smaller grounds it’s a much smaller for me still a massive confusing for me and it’s not user friendly I had a better idea of what to expect and I was able to work at all right now I didn’t panic you know it’s definitely better to try the smaller funds and it’s a fun that’s just if I may need to follow up being hi I work rather than use something I’m not necessarily in the right head space for because I think I had a really solid project idea but I don’t think I was in the right head space to manage such a thing you know and be the producer of fat so preparing money create a practice application also then fed into another opportunity came up and it meant that I had a clear project in mind to propose you know it’s old building into something so even if I’m hoping even if all of that work comes to more rejection I think I’ve got a much more solid idea of where to go when a specific project that might have some traction if I can just find the right people to approach a fight it for various reasons in addition to all of stocks I unexpectedly got Nikki snow gate as a judge for a writing competition you know it’s one of those things where every now and again because I you know I’m on link then and I have some job notifications because sometimes you get some things that are you know quick apply and it’s good to be visible on a on not professional social media I gas and you know get some notifications and then I’ll go for this saying really not expecting to get anything out of it because maybe they’re not being serious Sir maybe they’re paying peanuts third lots of things we got small things were ever applied for the money just never hear from them again or eight to hear from them and it’s only in the United States or something like that Sir you have to be able to traveler something for your buttons set they’re going to pay and so anyway so I paid in for this judging saying you know I went to their website and I applied a check to the lights and just never expected to hear from them again you know I just told them about my cell phone how was that and you know they offered me some judging on a short story competition and I really really enjoyed it hi this side when I finished my part I mean I feel Nish my box and then I got another box really enjoyed it and then costs are passed on all my goodness the stories were so strong I enjoyed it so much people are just so creative and previous for pitting themselves quite like that I learned quite a lot that’s wild because it’s something I’ve grappled with for quite a long time is how you deliver feedback twenty system just emotionally destroy people you know I’ve had that have a lot of the time it’s a close as a recipient and as a giver market dynamics feedback you know and I think in the creative space it’s different because things are much more subjective I think what they said was just more a bite you know you’re not value adding it and the census hi many marks the sisters are sentiment anyway your because you’re judging it but it’s not and not sensitive this is how you even that you can meet the criteria it’s not a bite dots it’s hi good a story can you tell hi E. gives your characterization you know and it’s more where your feedback can say things like I call really lost in these characters I wanted to spend more time with them or not twist at the end helped me like a sucker punch thought is brilliant you know stuff stuff like that and even when something something to check a well written but you can thank well I can see the story you were trying to tile and your descriptions are really benefits and maybe if you tried yes it might facilitate thought about but you know it was just lovely to be able to write feedback that might actually help people you know in praise their writing and their story telling you know I hope I hope I hope that’s what he is doing so you know I find that the police have a right to stop I think mentally from five years of really tough learning and work up recovery from the catastrophic break dying total per night but also reflecting on experiences wase added hers in the past hearings a past introduced errors into my work and I’m forcing this is something that happens and also law or at worst Dave actually trust it on a really personal level and they haven’t said back objectively or he was a bias or in a way that’s appropriate to be the intention of the pace you know appropriate to that enterprise of what’s going on it’s just maybe a factually incorrect you know there’s I’ve had a range of those experiences as well and I just really relish that opportunity a year because the competition really demanded thanks you know I think going through all their training stuff they were very clear that you know you have to approach reading these knowing that everyone tried their best with the opposite best of intentions and they love to telling that story and he had to make them on those terms you you had to make them and not say yes so I just need to get the side of my body I hope these ideas and I just need to tallest teal and they’re learning they’re crossed you know because some of them can be quite young people and some of them are writing in a language lesson their first language and some people are picking up a hobby they’ve never been interested in or had time C. B. A. interested investor ever before or maybe they’re in their retirement and they’re trying it out as a whole but you know there’s all different things and I think there’s quite serious writers he might use the competition as a way of trying I ate some saying for publication you know there’s a really wide range of entrance to this competition so my role Kim hi he helped a man prays again it’s very subjective because different judges will read it and read the same story in a different way and come away with different things you know I like the sort of coming out of from malicious my knowledge of this genre this is my knowledge of telling a short story this is my knowledge of characterization infection this is my knowledge of language you know in my role I style was two point night where things weren’t quite working right things really were working and maybe to offer I think I think if it had some of this maybe that would help you know this is really really enjoyable and I hope I hope it’s been useful to other people I mean as indicated already or you know I often think back to when I was teaching and I read each day I can ice over whether or not I was meaning to my students when marking their where can and costs and all sorts of things and I certainly have made hiding mistakes her you know when you have a memory of something and it stings she yeah thank gosh it was stupid and I think I’m trying to just lay in and a lot of back and thank you I just need to set but the embarrassment that’s not because I don’t know higher than that not a fax it’s the person who was on the receiving end of some mistakes that I manage you know because I remember I shouldn’t referring to the a certain film and the film was set different spelling of the words and I I don’t know %HESITATION brain fart I don’t know just was getting at know your spelling is wrong you’re continually spelling this wrong and didn’t you know I I with Jackie no no I’ve done it myself and I would go that’s still just half a we check in on their internet and kissing going mods and then I would say %HESITATION it is called interesting okay that’s me I’ve learned something today but previous over worked strong aides stressed to the Max me didn’t days not I’m not student was probably very rightly felt a sense of injustice but thought that stays with me and I beat myself up too much about that sort of thing but I learned from that you know I take out a board night you stop staying of embarrassment and she M. to learn and not do that hopefully to someone ever again produced double check myself because I’m not always to be trusted so I forget things so when things are anonymized and online it is really easy to associates from the person the human being he’s at the other end of that maybe this is come up with judges before where they’ve had thought because there’s lots of messages and your feedback form about you doing all insult people because they’ve clearly had that happen quite a lot and the stories are all anonymized we don’t know he has written them or where they’re from or you know maybe there’s very clear indications that English as their first language but you cannot take that for granted because there might be people with dyslexia or learning disabilities are not very high literacy who might be writing and and party that’s happened before where it is I need of English speaker and they’ve been really really insults us judge calling I might for her crossed with the English language you know so you did something you actually have to be careful but when everything’s anonymized I think that’s absolutely right you know what I think I certainly in this scenario you know it’s really stopping in my tracks and made me think about that sort of thing you know because it’s really not on to make somebody feel bad when you when they put their heart and soul into something was really good your intention what has struck me is I’ve been reading work the authors really wanted to write and that is a major shafts from years of reading students essays where and I am grossly generalizing here because I had so many where this was not the case but a lot of the time and I think increasingly over the years I came across that students resent having to DS nine months I mean it feels it’s safe you certainly hearing about Andreas more recent experiences as well it feels is safe things have really changed since I was an undergrad but then there are people I talk to you were an undergrad before even I was and for them they thought this sort of thing was always the case so I don’t know but I feel like and your G. saying Brady astronomical tuition face has been a massive pardon this sense of entitlement that comes with a resentment of having to do any work you know so it’s not all students but it’s enough of some that it makes the job of teaching them really miserable sometimes so again that’s all part of a totally separate issue actually this whole podcast is %HESITATION lots of separate issues and I’m just rambling on about eight so %HESITATION anyone makes it thirteen S. or not I don’t know I’m not going to you know go into detail on that again I’m really happy that to talk quite some of these issues and debate some of these things with people you know and I’m very happy to soccer practice I’m always willing to stand corrected and I’m always happy to pick copycats and because I know it’s not always the case and then I think emotionally it was so draining to work and that kind of environment where you’re really undervalued ready under appreciated and people are treating you as if you’re a teacher and they haven’t got a choice to be at university and you think will happen two years ago you didn’t have a choice to be at school and your teacher didn’t have a choice and you don’t have a choice but your teacher not it’s not how it works in tertiary education you came here what I will suggest you know in case anyone listing is on either side if this student teaching soft I called to me is that your whole being pitted against each other you know and I can say this quite safely from observing it from right side night you’re all being pitted against each other as a distraction from management malpractices and you can overcome the triangulation you know which is that the term you should look up to do with abusive behaviors and you can you can overcome that by being each other’s our ice just gonna float thought this nature there make friends students the people like Cheney and leading your seminars and your seminar should not lectures they’re not your enemy and they are not da man so just lay off a bit and expose for teaching staff these young people have so much against the minority it’s not even funny I’m a geriatric millennial and I’m fine in life really toss I just feel like two sides in an economic crashes took so much away from people like me and I was one of the lucky ones he script three and two thousand eight but something a lot of one seat you’re a bit younger than me doesn’t help a lot it’s a tough road you know and the younger ones that’s not fun night there guys you know it’s we need to help each other from I was young I was an avid reader and I developed a love of writing these strengthened as H. O. quite an internal person you know something I’ve always been aware of it by myself I’ve got such a vivid imagination on a day dream a lot I referee a law you know I write stuff coming you’re hearing me rambling on about stuff no I am essentially talking to myself but doing it to microphone and then some day somebody else might hear some of it says that I’m no longer just talking to myself make content I live talking to yourself why not these loaves of reading and writing they meant that as I aged I didn’t know hype but just some way some high I just wanted to be a writer for a long time and I see nine with the wrong intentions I wanted to be a great academic and that includes writing you know it was a way that I could write notes to soften be published and have my name on things and I certainly had potential to be a great academic and I was a very good one but so much of the profession makes me miserable it is not a world that is built for me it is a world that attacks he and damages may I tell you I feel like I’m hurled against walls repeatedly it’s like spider man being thrown into brick walls constantly sort of what it feels like me I don’t find Spock with an exoskeleton that does damage every time my friend doesn’t fit into those systems and the worst of thought was and the last job I was in university of Salford’s just was the most combative she might bring in and hi my brain and my body work on the damage I’m talking about in my case was lateral I lost a lot of my cognitive abilities when I became Ellis try S. five years ago you know it’s been five years and I’ve been reflecting on this quite a bit and you know I’ve had the good fortune as well as a determination in these past few years to really get to know myself and to study what’s going on with me because it’s been a bit difficult to access a lot of medical help you know I was struggling to to really get help you know I think it’s a really awful irony that you actually have to be well enough to seek help because I couldn’t physically say the words for such a long time that I needed help and then by the time my kids a pandemic had broken nights and it wasn’t physically safe she go and see the doctor and I wasn’t urgent enough they had to deal with people S. really urgent physiological illnesses so mental health always takes a backseat that does affect you physically but not as much as you know we’re reaching concert type eighties or something like that so you take a backseat I learned my slower operating system I learned about things that help the rebels I gained insights I worked to words assessments that might help diagnose what’s going on with me not that I think they’re on the same spot their conditions that I live west another operate under an ascendant you know it’s really powerful actually to learn from other people’s experiences so I appreciate that a lot and I think that inspires me to do things like less right around but you but hopefully you know maybe there’s somebody he’s hearing that S. one text back to hear something like this N. arts and culture podcast you know because it is already it is I suppose in a very roundabout way what I’m getting at is it is the love and the passion and my specialist and trusts and everything that this podcast dissipates that has kept me going that is see if my life’s that has given me a reason to keep going and to be in a help me learn about myself and to help me learn about others and what they’re going straight and see develop even stronger empathy and I have too much capacity for empathy already so I didn’t ready you need that but it is a way of working Siri I think a lot of promotions and thinking about information and getting stopped in your tracks and being a stalker questions or something confronting you with something and sort of put before seeing across that somebody’s worked really hard to develop and you can appreciate that you know I mean all of that it just fires me often does wonders for my mental health and that’s why you know what we need to take arts and culture seriously because I can actually address the shortfall that send our under funded National Health Service here you can help us help ourselves and it has definitely helped me see see myself and to figure myself lights and to take that time to learn how to properly administer self care you know and a medical science and all and then a couple weeks lush baths and get covered in glitter and feel comfort I mean do the hard work of getting therapy of being able to say what’s going on in your arm to bring in you can tell it’s really tough hi good I am at any of the writing I don’t think it’s for me to say I got some really great feedback I get some very helpful constructive feedback I’ve had some really rubbish we could pack that just goes I don’t like that change that to something I I like I’ll be happy with even though I’m not the audience which is something I’ve heard before from an editor you know but I know that I am a creative person within and cheated if brand and I think I’ve been railing against stocks for too long and I’d love to logic to get me wrong and I’m a logical person I solve puzzles site loves your problem solving and logical argumentation but I am also really intuitive a bite me when I make sayings I’ll measure it quite vaguely angle X. right or L. and when kicking ago I wonder what I’ll taste like and goes you know so I’ll try stuff and I’ll be in shit if and I’ll go well will not work with that so %HESITATION the servers are quite get together show maybe that’ll that’ll do something let’s just say shut the door on the way you know so I have to sing so I have a real passion for learning I have a low capacity for short term memory and I think something I’ve learned really very very far he recently is that it’s more likely that I have a slow processing time which is why I struggle to hold things in my head I’m like I struggled to hold more than one thing in my head at this time because I’ve I get frustrated with myself with language learning just as an example where you’re doing listening exercises you know and I’m well in the intermediate stage Wes my parish in Spanish I am having to replay the audio over and over and over because I I can only keep it for words in my head up once I come to you the whole sentence Mungo I remember that being in a shady when I was C. G. C. S. C. French as well it just really struggled to remember you it’s not that I struggle to know how to answer necessarily it’s more I can’t remember how some things you just said to me because I have to hold all this my head because you you tryna and I mean the way you learn languages later in life when you sort of lost thought natural capacity from childhoods you tend to go through lots of translation and I try really hard to be associate especially with nine to seize your things but associate the thing with its words are a state is just another word for orange and orange is just another word for marathon for example anyway another tangent but you know it’s made me realize like when I eat the more I’m learning about female autism and you know an ADHD is that actually you know I have quick bursts of memory I just can’t hold loads of it all at one time and it snowed a pro sass so it is going in it just takes more time than it does for most people to percolate for me so you know if we have a conversation about something I’ll call me immediately forgot what we just talked about it but in a by ten years time I’ll tell you nearly word for word what you said to me because I find that ability really strange that I can remember stuff that happened years ago really wild like really acute take to your queue they too well like entry simply what hell but I can’t remember what somebody said to me this morning or yesterday it just takes awhile to process remain so it’s really important thing to learn I think and that’s why it’s good for me to have an archive and I write stuff down all the time and I think you need to learn to work or whatever PS your end and not be too anxious but not you know I think I spent a lot of time being frustrated that my brains is not working the way it used to be part of it C. H. I’m part of it is a complete burner heats up this damage you know and I think that’s one of the issues with not recognizing mental health issues and I mean when I say mental health I mean neurological well being as well as you know that depression anxiety side of things as well it does damage connection skipper can things get harmed you know there are physical repercussions cherry bar nights and it takes quite awhile to heal from those just as it would with any other kind of injury you know so psychiatric injury is just not something we know enough about your take seriously user for me I know as the saying need to take one thing at a time and focus on that and align myself to be become absorbed you know I have an ability to hyper focus I love writing when I eight hundred eight it just flows remain I mean I’m still just reading from a handwritten notes that I wrote awhile ago as Pragya arguable says quite a lot if you do any sort of writing you’re a writer and I am a writer that’s whether I’m a good writer it’s for other people than the sides but it’s something I need to say and it’s something I want to say I am motivated today at my house to overcome I suppose the quite Methodists nobility and suffering and hard work that is quite hard wired and maybe it isn’t a frivolous thing today if it gives me releasing content man and it helps me keep my mate even and gives me a night not for saying such things I can only ever be a good thing and not doing it and getting out of practice with that is not helpful CPAS compacted story set people right and center competitions not send training I’m practicing spending a good yarn there’s no more joyous things to make them a good story told well you know we evolved humans evolved to be communicative bearings all of our primate cousins are communicative in some way and look at our circle we have developed to the languages and all the different kinds of communicating that we’ve developed and we find ways of telling our stories primarily to ourselves and then sharing them with others and making about four others on our capacity to projects and to send and receive stories makes us human that’s what we are there’s nothing frivolous a bite our very existence I’ve had to really CS myself dying without because I struggled to write a lot during the pandemic and I kept on my weekly blog for us on this occasion I did a lot of very personal stuff on there people were very kind and said they appreciated high honest I was surprised thanks I’m really meant to log there are times when I thought the co and it’s usually at times when my depression Sir really quite pads you know I’ve been trying to work to make an effort to make sure I have something on the blog even if it’s just something a dog I have my our case is high hills just to have something right there to make sure that I’m reading what I’ve written and doing something with it you know it’s all part of momentum and practice and evaluation because a lot of it isn’t very good so we have to look at and go well this can be better and here’s a way sick can praise and I’m not scared so I’ve been feeling very introspective about all of this I haven’t had too much to get by the name really in general but if anybody hears status on it and if it strikes a chord I hope you find your way and I know you can find your way if you take the time to spend with yourself that’s really hard to take some of us hadn’t had a choice in the past couple of years we were faced with ourselves and that was terrifying but if you’re able to do it on your own terms and it’s you can make some time for yourself non negotiable I really hope and I believe that you can figure out whatever it is you’re majoring a bite C. R. and if you’re not and if you’re all sorted I’m so happy for you honestly I’m always ever trying to find my way with stocks you know with the job in the ground applications I’ve been writing recently I feel the same S. I’m inclining towards side I’ve been trying to read more as file you know I’m trying to find I suppose a pass back to my younger self I used to too far picks and I just in doing an English degree throughly really spoiled me for backside just lost the love of reading but adult pressures and having to read stuff for work takes the fun out of it but you know so it can take me awhile to really get into reading again anyway so I have been trying to read more they they and I read a lot of non fiction they say sexually and I really enjoy it when I do read fiction I think I just have so many banks that I’ve owned for Aitchison of movie and they read them partially because it was for teaching research I picked it up and I never at times just actually sent retired or whatever it was you I just got too many pics that I own and I have not rant so I’m just trying to work through what it costs you know it’s interesting what catches my attention I’m not I get bored Wes I’m under often my mind from as I’m reading and turned away you know I have to just be honest until this offers three things anymore I’ve really says about myself and this is an ADHD saying that I have very little to no attention for anything that I find really dry or account specialize when I’m reading you know if I can imagine it in my hand I can’t read the rating board you know if I don’t really understand the words that are being sad or if things are described in a really bonds way and just No Way here so and sometimes you know why I have good ideas by the board meeting somebody else’s writing and I think that’s quite rich but there’s also no point not being honest I’m not gonna say him him taking out west and it’s not really fair because I’m sure other people got low tide if Sir Freddie accent writing it’s just I personally find it boring I mean I’m also trying to read the books have already call because my income and bank balance plummeted to write twenty twenty one and they haven’t recovered Emmy night I just hold it up my earnings for twenty twenty one twenty two financial year and that’s actually slightly less than the year before which is really depressed hang grateful for anything that I caught but then get a NAS it’s MRC messed me might take time last summer still really upset about that because I was entitled to see a payment from them that I’d in gas and it’s annoying but you know I resorted to the trading and selling a lot of my stuff including a lot of my picks you know it was pretty hard break into a tree and in the back that I bought for it ten quid ten years ago for fifty pay but I needed to fifty P. and the space on myself more than I needed to back anymore so I just had to yeah I just figured that if I ever won the Bosnian off then I can pick them up again maybe I’ll have more money in the future somehow any of these jobs are funding applications ever work right maybe I’ll be solvent again but you know the money as I say it was just more useful than having the object collecting dust and somebody else’s choice you know so I’m trying to read what I’m willing to part ways and then hopefully hyperspace some money for the things I do struggle to pick dying and devour the way yes Terry so usually have two picks on the go the one of my bad say teachable she she the more enjoyable one and then I have another one site to so far so there’s no excuse no dine time Andre pauses things and runs off quite a lot over watch and something and it’s infuriating so I always have something to tell you for a minute while you’re just sitting there and he’s fostered a bite always have a strategy no doubt come to spare I don’t the book aside to so far this time is doing this it’s quite a dry scholarly taxed that’s oxy a bunch of separate essays by the author publisher a number of years that been pulled together as one backed up by a specific talk back I’m not so perfectly fine and it’s a really important contribution to that specific failed I’m ready bored with it and it’s just not going and I’m not caring about any of it there’s lots of claims of a generalized fears and I find that really creating after a while because I think we can really only speak for ourselves unless we have data from user base or you know monitors audience participation I just don’t think it’s useful to go in here feels less will do thank you I got really tired of reading I sent some studies are architects and stuff and I go well I saw that and I did not feel like cuts do not speak for me I think because there’s nice photo center of stuff the descriptions are a bit wishy washy and very technical and I what was it like to move through the space you know describe into it for me in your words and that’s quite boring when that doesn’t happen for me you know it’s a useful exercise and discovering what I no longer want to read because it’s also no longer what I want to write I don’t want to write like that a nice compliment that I get when I D. art writing is set people can visualize what I’m talking about you even if it’s not an accurate visualization I can see something and I can feel something because of the way of rectified it and that’s really meaningful to me that people take the time to tell me that %HESITATION somebody once told me you know I read what you said and it made me want to be there and I don’t like on the calories I mean that’s that’s really high praise that’s what you want I’ve always wanted my research to be as accessible as possible I know it hasn’t always been a lot of my PhD was very heavy theory and philosophy eight I don’t think I can’t even really tell them to a lot of thought anymore when my brain work better I could work with sos complex theories and philosophies here to do the time and memory the very ontology of film and photography and all of socks you know I’m still interested in not ten extent but I think a lot of say very dry language that could be associated but thought I should just I don’t care anymore and you know I think I’ve really lost the ability to do the really really complex stuff I mean the stuff that’s just combative frankly and then you got a lot of it lost in translation you mean translator stay amazing work but my coach the French stuff can be so dense sometimes anyway I just I don’t have the desire really to build up so that again because quite frankly bored with and I do you want to be Frank about this you know the old white European dates have been telling us how it is when it’s not that way for most people’s lived experience just Europe ready picked out I may have done because I have these bits of embossed paper that shows at one time I had a pre vent ability to develop that proved that I could J. thought that I could park west to listen for coal and %HESITATION J. R. and all them fellas and I just want another challenge you know not challenge for me as well hi di make these complex ideas accessible to the people he thanks none of that nonsense is for them because I agree are not realizing up our calories were for me I don’t want anyone effort to grow up feeling lots of surfers free pony cursed our shouldn’t even be an issue you know what I’m interested and then as a valid being my own creative critical non fiction writing that is up front about my lived experience as well as the knowledge and research that I’ve acquired over these years innocently hello bite with some might balk if you ever read it I am going to end the show notes if you wanna stop by and have a price and I’d like to see Stapp they stop and take it further you know I’d like to write it back that people might pick up in Waterstones are reputable tech shops that pay their talk sense you know there’s a few more pics and me Everton one already I contributed to others I have these other plans they have these really favored strong ideas for other ones I want to catch them all right and I’m telling you all of this because I started to feel burnt right puts a podcast there in January gosh that was a long time to get into a lot from when I mentioned this before year’s abandon the podcast night and the night time most aren’t tremendous amounts and Matt loads of fantastic people and cooperators I’m keeping it going this is not a good pie we’ve already hard winter ten rock pop we don’t needs may be joining that bandwagon no I’m not going anywhere I mean they’re not going anywhere it’s just going somewhere else I think the podcast I think in just terms of my work it’s going to take a bit more of a backseat I’m going to do more things like last not just talking out your butt stuff but when I have some other episodes later where it’s just me talking L. B. a bite something I swear you know but I’m just having a break from the hustle because having had a break since January actually yes since January to decide I had a fake Hassel holes through the autumn and then January quite another big one and it’s actually been really lovely to knocked it out for a few months and I realized that I was I was actually getting quite fossils and %HESITATION suburbanites you know when I try to force myself to get back into that fray again of email in this person that person that person or re engine timezones and talking to strangers and trying to be super clear and my communications I just got stock because I come be bothered by cuts just draining of my creative energy he and rather than just fighting up and doing it anyway for work I’m not getting paid for because whatever pitch in H. I. gaps for this I don’t take the money it doesn’t belong to me it belongs to the podcast I use it for the podcast you know when you can go and visit and have a look on the website to see what I mean by that I don’t take away H. for doing this and that’s to the small amount of money to pay me a wage anyway so I’ve been just pondering about well why is that why did I get stock when I have to do the whole soul I think it’s because that while it is fun and it often produces really great results I don’t regret a toll you might do you find a training even when it’s really enjoyable I just find it completely drains me it takes a lot of creative energy away from other pursuits time to tired to write I come thank streets and to be blunt I am class they say I am just weary of working for free you know so as grateful as I am for the P. H. NH what I get in the months is a tiny bit more than an arch worse for real living wage and the U. K. I’m a volunteer for my company because the people college I don’t earn enough from a company to pay myself any fees so it gets the money I have spread sheets very charcoal face because you know I need money for things here so I know what belongs where what’s for what and you know ABC has its own spreadsheets I keep track of what’s money belongs to yet and so this is where I’ve been able to look and see okay I have enough to replace my laptop battery that’s just started to fail or upgrade the website for example and one off payments if anybody’s interested I do record does on there as well they all out of stock you know I have to keep a slow night si mantiene the websites for its on your payments but some pieces like that you know what to keep minutes things that I need for the show your quick then I can upgrade it’s not sort of saying I have some goals on my history on site so you know you can go in the close up and see what I’m working towards if you want to drop a few credits via the A. cast supporter link D. like at the show notes I’ll be in there and if you can leave the tech to help like that would be great it all adds up and it all helps we just need to be where I am with all of this and I make use of content that I’ve already in some way produced or see what comes along with light traffic on my part you know because there are times when I’ve said to people I love you because of the on the podcast so yeah I’d love to share anime Justin arrange anything yes I need to paid after Dayton but I also need to know that you want to do it because I can’t pay anyone so you know if you really want to do it then just reach out you know it’s fine but I’m not necessarily going to chase people and I’m at the minute just not gonna be very good at bites chasing people for contents because I’ve got some you know again just be involved in public people like me talking like that but you know that’s just how it is it’s a lot doing everything for a podcast by yourself I think people may be ashamed that like a lot of other podcasters I just send the soften up magically gets done IT everything for this based I. G. every saying this is my entire P. abate IG all the things every bit of it you know so unless I’m talking to somebody else and then they’re giving me not content that’s great but also not I’m doing everything graphic design editing marketing and social media posts I’m scaling back on I really just need to scale out back while I begin some energy and try other ways of making a living because this is not made me a living this is made me a tiny bit of pocket money that’s not even mine the %HESITATION preferably I’d like to make a living with my first love of writing an example is you know I had ideas for two episodes where was intending to focus on the Iraq collectives when of the Turner prize back in December you know their collectives that actually I’ve known for a long time I visited to show and you know and I invited them on the show back in twenty nineteen when I was visiting Belfast again I invited them last August when they were nominated for the Turner prize I don’t know if they got the messages or if they’re too busy or and %HESITATION went straight into their junk mail or S. you know there’s just eleven of them and you may as well try and hurt costs I didn’t hear anything back and I didn’t GSM because other people wanted to be on the show I don’t have an employee who is chasing out stuff up it’s me I have to do it and I find that really exhausting if lots of people approach me and want to cast that’s easy for me because I have to do the hard work of getting them back John and shad chilling things on a lot of these people are in the United States so we’re working with the time difference again it’s I’m so grateful but it’s still hard work for me you just never taste any of it up you know with the right stuff I mean everybody’s very welcome anytime on the show it’s just this is a great me just not having the energy or the where with all to chase people and then I thought with a raise while you know the third just download the podcasts and including the very marvelous talk arch you know you should listen to the mom laughs and there are other ones sipping on its file you know I just don’t know if there’s anything more I can that’s because they’ve already had really interesting public discussions I don’t know if I have any questions or comments that will be in any way insightful because they’ve had really insightful public conversations their work reasons I she’s with the state of arts criticism as well as loads and loads and loads of other passion and she’s in you know this was written up by its so per plate by cara Hickey and Jan Morrow I can I will thanks affect your article in the show notes %HESITATION I think that was with adolescents I also floated by sending an absolute with them talking ites what those problems are and these are problems with art writing that a small organization like the white P. for example is also trying to address in their way you know I think some of my introspection recently has shown me that I want to confront this head on by finding are carving a way to get funded for critical writing that’s also creative and accessible and you buy critical I mean engagement from a place of knowledge and learning not criticizing which is what reviewers seem to saying very often that they’re supposed to date or that they enjoy watching or whatever angled coming at this from I’m not interested it’s and punching dying or defining what are it can be and should be very much the opposite of my kitchen I wanna throw thought to be wide open and challenge it in trouble at this month’s bill imposed by injuries which is what my scholarship has always Pena bites you know it’s been a bite thought since I was you know a fairly flat chest young PhD so I welcome and encourage anybody see join me in China about all of that and talking at all lights I want a lesson and I wanna learn I wanna ponder and I want to produce I want to just soak it all up and then I’ll have something to say you know when I have to deal the producing the editing the backing of people that’s the thing I find really tiring is just getting timings and stuff sorted out and picking people and you know especially the marketing and you for all of that stuff to happen it renders me a lot less effective as a learner and the thinker and so I’m just trying to strike more of an efficient and effective balance and do not work because I am not in a position to hire an assistant he’s brilliant to journalists thanks and love seeing all those things finds a locked at a you saying im as I am with that stuff and I want you to tell me and the email address is in the show notes you sound right to me you never go on the websites and scored his contact PH higher you hire you dang what do you want to know what do you want to hear a bites do you have any questions do you have any suggestions do you want to be a guest on the show for conversation you want to come on and tell me all about yourself and all that wonderful things in your daily are you encountering frustrations are worries and your own creative life or career I really want to know I just don’t wanna have you know a ten string email conversation about it I just want to go yeah I want to be in your show here’s the times I’m available hi but yea yet to date not time here’s a link see you then check can gauge role here let’s go that’s kind of how I want to run it because I haven’t got the energy to go this is not to come reaching out to him in this times on the digital no just tell me when you’re available tell me when you want to come just a shame that I am not as a mmhm frighteningly available for a lady I don’t know I’m so I’m gonna flow test I’m gonna attempt and you’re chasing a recommendations section I mean I’ve name dropped a bunch of stuff and this already but if you wanna subscribe to the newsletter which you candy had already visual cultures dot com I have a piece Paul Dirac’s section where I recommend a podcast and I’ve been enjoying and I’d love to start out here you did maybe talk about programs or films affects I’ve been watching reading and getting a lot are you does yeah I’m very interested in the writing in to tell me what you’re getting a lot are dogs and you’d like to share with people you can email or the visual cultures at G. mail dot com or join the mailing list and replied MSH and if you do join thought to you to make sure bring your CEFs Sanders last you know and we’re not going to do your junk or spam because some might be where a lot of mess you’re going from the initial people you signed up if you’d like to view the full versions of lots of the audio visual cultures recordings this one’s included I’ve included a photo video fest which is going to be extremely non we’re at two yards a lap in forty nine fifty not so much a browser on and there’s extra stuff in there for behind the scenes here people C. contract up stuff I ate at GL dot com forward slash AP cultures you can have a lake arts all of the tears if you join and not tear the behind the scenes here you can see all of my fumbling and all of the caps and all of me knocking into the microphone and all sorts of endearing sayings that I make you keep coming back for more and more and more adorable P. shenanigans there might even be special messages just for you there certainly is at the beginning of the video for this recording that’s happening right now only if you cut through all of this thank you for sticking with me the next episode I promise will be a boy some saying definitely S. saying not just me rambling up by things that come into my head manger Siles I would say catch you next time but I’ve started listening to me is the hell’s period power and she says that at the end of every episode so I’m going to change mine I’m not going to be precious I do not own those five words so I’m gonna change out my closing salutation and I’m gonna go back to an old favorite as ever be excellent to yourselves and each other and party on my days


Audiovisual Cultures episode 116 – Folk Art with Bethany Stead automated transcript

hello and welcome to audio visual cultures podcast I am your host Paula there today I have the greatest pleasure of speaking with Bethany Stagg it's about practicing across different media exploring issues and themes around gender sacks class mythology folklore bodies and awkwardness and what it's like being a member of Newbridge and the wider arts community and new castle I think Bethany as an example of a thoughtful and emotionally intelligent RT career artist and I'm sure you'll get a lot of our conversation this interview was originally recorded back in January for the Sox radio residency at the new bridge project in Newcastle upon Tyne Newbridge as an artist led community established in twenty ten that supports the development of creative practitioners of many kinds through the provision of space exhibitions on defense they particularly encourage collaborative ways of working and community involvement as well here Bethany is one of their more recent members and it's getting established and her practice a massive thank you to our patrons over at Peachtree on dot com forward slash AP cultures if you're interested in hearing the original broadcasts of these three past episodes including caption enabled video versions join us at the by P. as he's here for two pints fifty a month or equivalent wherever you are many thanks as well to all our listeners and to those of you sharing episodes on social media it's a great help and really appreciate it please stay also gives a good rating wherever you're testing as this helps others find the show and if you write some nice feedback your testimonial might just get featured on our website which is much improved thank the funding from our patrons for night enjoy this chopped with Bethany stead S. any stats thank you so much for joining me I been really enjoying learning about your work recently and I really appreciate you speaking to me for the Sox radio residency at Newbridge under worries thank you it's lovely to be unbiased and lovely to meet you strong gains still fascinate and what ways do you tend to describe your practice as an artist not really the one thing I struggle the most with the jingle of awestruck with is to describe the practice yeah I have I always have a description of my website it's always a work in progress it changes all the time %HESITATION probably say it's multi faceted love there I say which in my case kind of sounds cool it's a bit all over the place I definitely got sky brain but in an organized way it's not I did a lot of different areas or try to you when I get the time I would mainly say I work in sculpture and ceramics my medium span across also the different ones though such as drawing painting woodwork and textiles I cost myself as a working class queer artist and I'm really interested in craft and folk call and looking at these underrepresented skills and this work this overlooked and exploring the class sex and gender of the people who engage in these practices yes I'm trying to highlight doc by using these skills myself we're trying to learn them quite often yeah one part of my practice is that most of the work I create is inspired by surrealism mainly because of the world building aspect of that and then they skate prism to enter another world that's solely your own %HESITATION can be for others too so I think yeah that's that's why I'm really inspired by surrealism and also explore a little bit of animism and to promote this %HESITATION looking at the symbols and not and trying to highlight the importance of storytelling and symbolism I'm really interested in inter generational storytelling so am I stoned from different generations down to my generation down to younger generations and and how really important I think that is and the writing of those stories and for us to write stories and shad them as a form of therapy and then I suppose the clothes a lot off all of these different interests the so many more but has brought me to work with people in general so I'm a facilitator but also ask most of our %HESITATION I still as well I have to work the different jobs that slightly unrelated but I try to make it as relatable as possible so I work with people in my day job running groups activities %HESITATION fishing impaired people and then I work on a freelance basis to as a facilitator with community groups underrepresented peoples and I like to do %HESITATION this to contribute towards accessibility opportunities mutilate and radical spaces that's brilliant that's really wonderful very details yes I've been enjoying pricing for your website and a lot of your work I think particularly your sculptural work but I think across all of it feels very talks tile it can feel the traces of ye they're embarking scoring sends the cross person check that goes into a lot of it feels right talks file suit I take it you enjoy the physicality of working with the auction materials in your hands and I'm guessing all you have to show yet a lot of it is about the process sometimes and the people that I meet through that process and communal making as well so I really enjoyed just the act of making a lot of the time it doesn't always have to result in something beautiful and yeah definitely the tactility and touch especially with clay and sculpture in general I think that's why I lean more towards sculptures because I like to be able to touch things I like to be able to feel it within my presence rather than two D. based works just don't feel as president I mean anyway I think what I've been protecting the struck by is a lot of your work where you're combining a body parts with the vessel of some kind I think as a woman and that some may I tend I tend to face is a woman you know stop it's a really striking type of image on this very low debts and stop the service area that you're trying to poke out to Fenton explorer yeah yes social so like the body as a vessel the body to carry things carry a lot of weight Harry this creates carry anything but I'm also really interested in the ancient use of these kind of vessels and and this kind of way of like this sort of decorative vessel that uses body pops is been long being used there full I find that really interesting I think a lot of the time it would be towards godsend I like to celebrate god's I think people might have worshipped and etcetera yes Sir I'm I definitely do lean towards those kinds of politics with the vessels I suppose what would you say you've been working on quite recently and a recent I think we can be flexible bye bye that means weekly or monthly or the past few years is there anything particular you from working on and do you have anything coming out I know again that's very tricky because the grind is constantly shifting on her wrist at the beginning of twenty twenty two yes so what what sort of stuff eating hi yeah so I just go over the batch making so many ceramics so I'm starting to teach myself to make more functional functional west tional pieces that people can buy because aka find a way to make money from my all in some way and as much as I hate to rationalize asking costume anyway go go sometimes not be anyway but one of the quickest ways yeah I've been learning not and learning and not a lot from not so I've been making a lot of functional pieces because I had to %HESITATION market still in the eighties band market and that was really interesting because I was the first time I entered the realm of craft all market and the full I was purely just making work with the idea to exhibit in a gallery and hopefully maybe someone would want to buy them but I didn't really care about the aspect of it so it was it was really different to into that kind of realm and it was nice but also made me realize I do want to try and keep those separate in some way it's also been working on and took part in that now that's why Cologne exhibition my system gallery and spaghetti factory and it was amazing that was pretty fun it was nice to be a part of something so big and such an amazing idea I don't think I've ever actually heard of of an open goal I don't know did you hear of it I did I saw a lot of posts on Instagram am sorry worst was and not as well and I have known her for awhile nice yeah it's nice to see like lots of different artists from different backgrounds coming together from the northeast as well yes I took the call and not and then just looking on my Instagram to trying and remember what I'm doing recently because that's the main place people think %HESITATION yes it will not this slightly different to the things I create is I've also been working for Kerry assaults and not charity as a youth group facilitator so we've been making up together with our youth group and Austin really nice and I'm learning a lot from that some of the things I've been working on recently would you say there's anything that you may be protecting charmed so your membership in your French your high much does the studio and projects B. S. factor into your work or have you had any experiences that you think are notable or have been useful for you the studio has been amazing I think it would be hard to say that having studio wouldn't be helpful for any all I suppose and the collective studio program is brilliant by Jen generally Hobbs not an amazing experience on not but that wasn't to do with new bridge that was because of cove it because me and it couldn't really be a collective which is sad but the most amazing thing that new bridge are doing now is still letting us be involved and the opportunities that happening on the current collective studio which is great and it's really good at them and I think one of the best things I've gone out of being a part of new bridge is the support system and the support network and I feel with the staff and all this stuff and that I can always contact them and look to them as in any career all S. as a mental second contact people for advice not officially saying that they would be my mental but everyone seems so open to passing on information and advice and helping as much as they possibly can without putting themselves out and yeah so I think that some of my favorite things about new bridges the sense of support and community and you know they just always willing to give as much as they can even sometimes in their own time when you know they're not being paid for it so I think that's a really really nice thing about new bridge yeah and then also just having a hope to see other people like when I didn't have a studio before and it was also locked down so I wouldn't be seeing people but I wouldn't have gone out of my way to see other Austin meet with their office but now it's so nice just walk into the building and see everyone and say hello and yeah that said it is a beautiful hope to be an extremely nice have you been involved with you branch for a while then %HESITATION you roughly how long have you been a member there yeah M. I. start the collective studio in two thousand and nineteen well maybe two thousand and twenty I think I've been there for about two years I think it got extended a little bit because of code and and I've only just started to feel like I can actually be a part of new bridge and if all of the community because of working I was working full time after graduating I graduated in two thousand nineteen and I think most artists go through that whether they you know you have to get a normal lifestyle opened them and most people don't have time to make calls for quite awhile so can you just start feeling like I can be a part of the community and it's really not the feeling may have been with them for that long and then I've I've known of them since I studied that because they have good connections with the Newcastle University our study so great do you have any thoughts on the arts probably more generally in new castle or the northeast that you'd be happy to share I'm just thinking of bites what may be it for yes it's a bit of an awkward term but as an emerging artist disposer RD career artist what is the big challenges you think you've mentioned some therapy just existing just being a life is one for stars %HESITATION never mind the co that situation but I am the sort of challenges that you might face but also are there any benefits to yes and what's the climate like for you at the moment yeah definitely you've got a couple and probably one of the best things that comes to my head is %HESITATION obviously like the lack of opportunities in the creative sector in the northeast especially jobs wise maybe not so much also the genies but still that as well there's a little bit of a lack of thought and that can be difficult because there's often this horrible competitiveness with your circle of friends if you are friends books of all S. stock you have to be put up against each other all the time in this also this horrible capitalistic way of looking at things and all capitalistic way of life lifted up against each other and not can be really difficult at times and it almost feels like more here than if I was somewhere else such as a big city like London or Manchester just because the way less opportunities so I'm going to know at least five or six people who are going for the same job with the same opportunity as me and I hate I hate that we have to and and it makes it difficult to talk about but we should talk about it I feel something that we should address yeah that's one of the difficult things I think about being honest here but I'm not kind of contracted with we have such a beautiful tight knit small community and I wouldn't change that because it's so nice to just know everyone and I also feel like it's very open as well although we have to compete with each other the things it does not feel competitive and I feel like people are very open to letting anyone and you know I think new castle and the art scene here dedicated to being accessible and seem to always be trying specially in the spaces diinta such as new bridge and other similar organizations the chart that I work for curious all right yeah that's kind of contracted thought nice point would be kind of nice M. if things could be more integrated like a less of a separation between people who are finalists in people who were working for me not some people who work in theaters and people who work in music it would be nice if they could be more of a more collaborative projects and how %HESITATION but anyway need funding for that kind of stuff and it's not much a PS that's great I think just picking up on your last point about collaboration across different practices different media different ways of working that's very much what audio visual cultures podcasts is qualified as in slippages and convergence across in saying so it's really great to hear a young artist like yourself talking like that you know it's really encouraging and I suppose that's that of a call to arms to everybody you might be hearing this is we need to fax us you know we need to %HESITATION Zacapa buttons be able to facilitate those sorts of collaborations happening more and I think as she pointed towards there it probably begins with hopping the awkward conversation so Frankel we want to do this so I can the forces and obeying I complete make this happen I can only make funding bodies take a bit more notice of slots I was speaking earlier say west Paul and Chris here the director's opinion a lot of our conversation he was ready them the man take the loss of your best at commercial union high speed can stay hot a building that was from the thought kind of thing and it's gone nine and what our process becoming and it's you guys sick it's had as much diminished from what it was so it's how do we rate bells and the arts but it feels like a pile as well yeah yeah that's scary not so scary thing that's happened I suppose this year which I guess I haven't related to so much because I feel very lucky to have been able to get a studio new bridge but lots of other people are waiting because they've had the studio's Justina ripped away from them in the center of town as well and its commercial union house and then also breezes while has gone right around the corner and that's really sad and I'm not entirely sure what they've gone too but it isn't it just like offices and new city development does not work well if conte as far as I'm aware and they haven't really started to be publicized anything yet because the building as it is at the moment S. and actually workable they're nowhere close to being it was open to the public yet silly everything's at a state of flux is becoming yes it's quite strange and it's difficult Senate sides and maybe there's opportunity there I feel like we need to give everybody a chance can go come on thank you we have to fight for this this is worst fighting for yeah yeah sure I agree the city is changing and it's changed so much since I've lived here I've lived here six she has not already seen it it's just becoming definitely way more commercial and it's about consumers consume you know be in the city center and shopping gives you I. N. eat and stay for longer with all of this fancy furniture that I'm putting on on the different streets in new castle and I feel like I'm not tapping into that already great creative scene that they've got yeah that they could be talking into mall because they don't really pound signs and not because I don't I don't it's a stop loss and we feel very lucky to be able to have a studio and sorry for the people dot com how one of the moment and hope that people can still keep creating in anyway possible BASF where can listeners find dates more by Iraqi mentioned we've been mentioning your websites would you be happy to just say that I hate for people yeah M. the website is just W. W. W. dot Bethany stats dot com I mean I'm not the best updating at I'm still getting to grips with all of that side of things and yes Sir it might not might not be updated very often but they mainly you can find most of my things on Instagram and lies just best stats underline so I probably update on the most I find Instagram tiring sitting it almost feels necessary yes it can be quite a smog you have to be your own marketer as well it's like you're saying it's part of the current economy the straight answer call debate I have some other way said podcasts and other work that IT constantly promoting yourself is quite to taking and it feels gross as well I don't know about you I just feel doing yeah anyone who follows me on Instagram it would I want people to know that I don't particularly love the self promotion but like having the Instagram in the first place it feels necessary sometimes are just to get yourself known it's not amazing for mental health no the also actions I was just gonna mention on mental health I need to change how people were wanting and help with mental health as artists I know that the social network are offering a lot of free mental health all workshops for us lots of mindfulness sector this is a brilliant thing that's also something that and would be worth talking about as well as a group I'm Paul often don't know if you've ever heard of it the social network I think I've heard roughly about it recently but I don't know very much a piece feel free to expound on the eight so it's a network of all I start work with people socially socially engaged practice work with communities and myself and another officer via Boston they're an amazing illustrator you should check them out yeah they have wonderful lack we are going to be organizing is soon meeting absolutely anyone who's interested Republican appetizing Instagram probably Newbridge emails all over the place hopefully and it'll just be for people who want to come along and hear about the organization they often have a lot of cool different projects going that you can get funding floral you can write to them and create your own projects with them yes so ingrained we're gonna DO seeming fast and I'm going to do an in person meeting that's going to come later yes to anyone who wants to listen about being socialized when they all one who when they would like to be one and kind of share all I can ease of thought because it can be sometimes difficult being a freelance facilitator %HESITATION freelance socialized and not knowing who to turn to you when you come to a difficult situation participants could be telling you information confidential information and you don't know how to deal with so it's good to have that support network of all S. people who've been in the field for a long time and know what to do about that and can offer maybe some younger socialized up nice yeah I'll be sharing through new bridge and Instagram wonderful well that's brilliant thank you for adding last year again very important issues there with I'm very interested in where art practice intersects with activism as well so I think those sorts of areas are really important again T. talk more by age and said it takes seriously and to get support for so long yeah I really appreciate you having that and that sounds wonderful and no worries and is there anything else that we have on coverage that you're quite keen to retire or the same could be useful for people to know I don't know if you don't for this and that may be that sorry if I sounded cool quidditch also a massive part of my practice in exploration is about what Christmas is well and trying to become comfortable in not I would tell people a lot if we could all just become comfortable with Arnold quickness I'm John compatibility yes a lot just like an aspect of my practice that didn't really highlight I suppose and a lot of the physical works I make are about my dealings with Eling of uncomfortable T. inside my own body and amongst other bodies and how to deal with that feeling and how to just let it settle and be a part of those because it is a part of human nature nothing really run smoothly just the society we live and makes us feel like it I love that I love that really putting a spotlight on awkwardness but not not and that way T. C. M. C. perhaps celebrates and be honest because I think you're absolutely right and I think people feel moral courage more often than they like to be met say and I think those of us who feel very awkward and particularly in social situations it should be okay to feel like yeah it's probably become a lot more of those that feel like after the past two years as well and then the thing those of us who you are at your first and he spent many years working all C. passing as normals this is a hard hit rate will be you know you just come back and argues and that's quite difficult Sam merchant not when you've just got over yourself enough to get it right there and then you haven't been able to get away there is quite difficult said Emma so much of my life is spent on screens for two years and then I'm just going to the show that's %HESITATION someone's talking to me but they J. yeah hello yeah it's good to just try and be at ease with those horrible feelings and just take them as offline right and turn them into good things I really appreciate what you said as well as our quickness with bodies and your own and other bodies I'm really looking forward to seeing how you develop or not because you know I feel like there's for anyone who's paying attention there is more and more hi there a police body shaming and Hyatt said overcome that sort of thing but this is a bit different this isn't you know the full scale saying it's not a strong asset because being awkward it's something that you can pretend not to be but feel very deeply at sites yeah I think there's a lot there to really explore impact apart so in ready came to see what %HESITATION what all you work on Tuesday with socks yeah for sure thank you yes in the sense thank you so very much for your time I've really enjoyed our conversation I feel like we've been talking for a relatively short time but we've settled law so thank you for that it's really wonderful and that I. two S. year really great rest of your day great thank you very much and you too thank you for giving me the opportunity is really nice is actually the first time I've done this probably since university when I was forced to do it in a presentation yeah it's nice it's a cool experience to me to expand on my practice thank you grace well you're very welcome on audio visual cultures podcast anytime thank you my great thanks start again she passed the name I'm really looking forward to seeing her work develop I'm particularly struck by her Fassel sculptures have been the %HESITATION reminded me of the entrance side higher than this a few years ago when I read this writer in residence at Yorkshire sculpture international learning more about you vassals in the context of sculpture was quite a big part of our residency for me so it was really interesting to see speak set pass any python cap a reminder of so many of the issues that arise when we think about it Fassel send conjunction with female parties please see follow fascinate she's got a really great and stick around because this was quite a short conversation again and it was perfect for the short form type of broadcast at leveraging but because it's quite short for the podcast not that it really has doesn't really have a saturation which is a lovely thing about podcasting but because it is a bit short I thought I just take the opportunity at the end just talk to you but some stuff so if you're not ready entrusted spend you can skip on but if you are I you know I'd really love it if he'd stick around I wanted to talk to you and a bit more detail about our newsletter because every month I put together a free newsletter dot looks back on not months in the podcast so I really set on the last day of every month and that the Xbox at what has been happening with the podcast out months and if there's anything else I have worked on %HESITATION had published or John that is where sharing but I also make podcast recommendations every months and I'm very happy and Cayden seek out recommendations from other people I'd love it if you could sign up to the mailing list it means that you also cats knee opposite notifications sent all the links you get direct link see the transcript and the audio Graham as well as the episodes you know it's an easy thing then if he if he felt like he could ship it before it as it is on to somebody who you think would really enjoy it but also you can write directly back to me and let me know what you think I've started to a pet testimonies on the front page of our website because you know if I do say so myself I think it's a make a decent ratio and it paid off late if we could get more people less than our Instagram followers keep creeping up on I'm I feel radiant showing this it's been really nice to see some organic gross I can't from barges by those and sensor type people Hey promise cheap sarees ands and Dyson's of new followers and promise that they'll be organic and it's just a load of faults and nonsense and pages trying to extort money IT and that's money I don't have frankly any money IT again from patrons it is paid into the podcast in some way and the priorities really have pain recording equipment to improve design quality and have been graduating that if you go back and listen to a party or aptitudes and compare them with what I've been doing recently especially in the past few months because I've got a decent microphone night and I've discovered St Custer which has been brilliant so even the people I interview you know because a lot of these last few interviews that we've had these are people he we're just talking out their laptop you know a lot of them aren't wearing headphones and it's far better quality than what I was getting from Sam and Sam has been amazing I mean I think a lot of us can agree that it's been a bit of a lifesaver for the past two years but you know there's a lot to develop there and I mean these are free technology so I don't really feel like I can't complain about anything but my computer had been how an issue system for quite awhile and sang Coster has been really wonderful and much easier to work with when I get the files on it automatically this is just become an advert for his and Castro wasn't really intend them to talk about it but it is really great I really recommend that if you are recording any audio even if your cordon video actually there are no videos of these three recording C. slacks recordings that I've made so but Paul and Christmas Fabian with tech and with Bethany I didn't record video for those babies just the audio so there's new videos for those but mostly when I have a podcast recording that I've done online and she usually make S. serve are fine with me recording video as well our behind the scenes patrons get access to those videos it's exclusive access and I don't cost them I just know I the way I did it it's because eight pieces just be the same video recorded anyway and I would just stick out on boats with sand caster it 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H. breeding of it if you join up I don't have a huge list of people on the mailing list and probably most of those are going into junk mail because it's one of those things where it's a G. mail kind so it's not official so it probably end up in your junk mail so you have to remember that to look in your junk mail and make sure you add audio visual cultures at G. mail dot com to your safe senders I mean hopefully have soared at that alright nice for anybody who signs up night it's not just me talking about the show and I do give you a bit of a sneak peek and what's coming up in the following months so this is coming ites in April and if you go to our homepage artificial cultures dot com there's a link on the home page and there's a link on the contact page so you instead easy to sign up it's just asking for your email address I don't want any of your data if you do that so for example this comes out in April on the last day of April you look at a new Sattar that goes back over what's happened in April but %HESITATION so you'll get a sneak peek and what's coming night in may before anybody else you might be aware that I make stuff on a salad on it see so there's a discount code that you can access through this email as well if you're interested there's links to other stuff that I work on but I'm also very happy to feature what other people have done and I'm very happy to feature what made Pete trends have been up today as well I have a section where I link to my blog but at the time of recording this ramble I haven't been writing very much in my blog because I've buried and audio editing %HESITATION and working on job applications so I haven't really had much head space T. write anything for my blog and I've also been trying to work towards writing for publication as well so the blog has fallen by the wayside again so be great if you sign up for that and I I do you recommend other podcasts I have a section I recommend to poke past Simpson I finessed and J. and I mean I can't listen to all of them so you know I'm very happy for you to get back in touch you can reply directly to that email tell me but something deep in the S. and J. and if you're happy for me to share thoughts then you can have thought corner of Sydneysider the next time I love it to be more cooperative and you know if you find a blog that you're getting a lot I know of and share that with me as well or if there's an online resource or there's a you tube channel anything like that a toll I am very happy to share as well what you spend less than T. or reading and so on and so forth back recommendations might even be something we start paying very very open to feedback as well because I've just picked a stick out there thinking what can I tell you a fight and I don't know if it's landing or not because nobody ever tells me so if you've got any suggestions I'm really happy to hear from you by them yeah and I'm very happy to hear suggestions by what casts we can open the podcaster what topics we can J. I'm ready hoping that and you can come back again at some point he's on research leaves this semester so hopefully he'll have more time we can see some of our old fashions let's watch a movie and talk about a debt type practice so that's that'll be fun and even some of my previous gas I'd love to ready to eat that sort of thing with them two eight and also if you're listening and you make a podcast and you'd be happy for me to cast on it in some capacity I'm really open saying that stadium I'm ready came to talk to other people as well and bills more if the podcasting community so I think the other thing I'd love to mention %HESITATION I mentioned at the start is wild but I upgraded to the podcast website or the official cultures dot com so over excited about thoughts you it's really starting to take shape I can at the time of recording I haven't changed a huge amount but I have made bets of it pretty %HESITATION I second can he lay and hope fully just starting to make it look a bit more professional because there's just more I can day night with the upgrades I suppose I wanted to point tight as wild that I. D. offer transcripts they're not perfect there the automated transcripts that I got from a cast he hosts the podcast and those transcripts are not public so I have to request a transcript from a cast then they give it to me and my E. L. studio area of the podcast uploading bet then I have to die no debt and copyists and see a blog post and I have at times copy them into YouTube videos as well because there is a problem there awhile ago it seems have cleared up nicely but there is a problem I see you chip automatically making the auto captions and Vietnamese or Korean or Indonesian or something like that it's a really strange phenomenon which seems of come dine again so that has been you sold but they are far from perfect the things they do with even just me saying my name is quite interesting I think you can get the chest from them to be honest I don't have the time really C. go through them it takes ours there are two episodes that ta Masha episodes and the community Kovic episodes those two transcripts I did added them properly and not take certainly with the tamasha one because that was a long session with three people talking that was a long process that takes several days to addicts I don't get paid for this work so I can't give several days I I already do you stop with editing the audio because I'm very particular about editing the audio for these I have signed sensitivity and she's and so I like nice clean audio I like clean up as much as possible I like closing up the gaps because yes it takes me days maybe two caps but I don't think it should take people based on lessons headset hook I like it to be as tight as possible there's not really a huge amount of action time I'm willing to get this because although I have insurance I don't have a lot of them I appreciate what I have but I'm hardly making a living I mean I'm hardly even making pocket money at this stage what the website upgrades has afforded me is I can I take payments on the website directly and what I've done is I've set up several ways for you can very quickly just drop me a pointer fiver or whatever you want to J. via pay pal or a card payment if you just wanna throw something in the tip jar to go to words general support for the podcast because that does accumulate it will help me pay for the website pay for the dominion and that sort of thing but I've also made one where you can make a FISA pines monthly payments that is specifically towards transcripts and the idea of fast is for every five pints a month I casts fired rockets I will spend thirty minutes tidying up of a transcript but also for a subscriber you'll get early access to the transcript so you'll be able to read through the transcript before the episode comes light publicly see again already access plus I will spend thirty minutes for every five pines you know editing a transcript so that it reads properly and you can see what I things are supposed to be spelled and %HESITATION maybe paid a few hyperlinks and you know that sort of stuff so that that would be a a specific fund just today that's because I'll do it if I'm getting paid to do it but I cannot give any more free time today S. really so I guess that's where okta things tonight three just wanted to point those things all right it's a really tough climate right there for everybody and I think especially in the U. K. at the moment we're being hit hard financially a cross a lot of different areas said prices have really gone up fuel prices in Britain have skyrocketed we're not in a great way at the moment so I completely appreciate that it's really tough for people to the pay for things you know and we've all caught so many charities vying for our money it's overwhelming I do get that as well and nobody asked me to date S. I'm Jan that's off by about so I am aware of sock tape my circumstances mean that I am job hunting I can't sustain this for much longer I wish I could make this podcast my job I wish I could make it weekly and that it could be my jaw opens I earned enough said make a small living from it or at least enough that I could supplement that way other income I always was a project that just has no end point that they'll just be what it is and tell I can't make it anymore I suppose that's just where we're up with things at the time of recording and recording us in February so things may have changed drastically and the two months between recording this and the apps are coming right and also people feel that three things on the internet should be free and I feel like crap today this was to get a little bit political here I think my ideal would be some sort of basic universal income that wasn't like can't you and the U. K. if you're nesting elsewhere we have universal credit here which replaced job seeker signs a collapse a lot of different benefits including unemployment benefits and so on it's notoriously difficult to apply for it's really not enough to live off and just like J. essay you have to apply for every job owners before they'll give you any money and so it's very difficult he tries to fight and be a creative and find your way be a start up you know all those kinds of things when there's not really any traditional farming up in use for you I'm a nine actually started tests for three years ago I had some money because I had a really terrible time and it worked yes it deeply affected my house I had to resign and I was given quite a substantial pay art from that and so when I started this podcast I had quite a bit of money in savings from not that's all gone and and I am afraid of reading off my partner he is miserable in his job and what's like to try something new a night and yet it's it's very difficult to take the late when the grinds constantly shifting underneath you and you don't know where you're gonna land and I think it couple of generations ago it was maybe a bit easier to take a kind of late because you could just pick up a job again that is not a climate where in ninth it is quite scary you know I'm feeling very rest Hurst I suppose that's the backdrop to what's going on with me at the moment and I don't know what's really in store so I'm not happy notes stop bothering at the eight yeah I just really appreciate it I sent thanks a few minutes the end of this hope wasn't a boring please see check quite somewhat soft jacket Bethany's work check great audio visual cultures dot com check eight GL dot com forward slash AP cultures mind yourselves take care and a catchy next time

Audiovisual Cultures episode 115 – Performance Art with Richard James Hall automated transcript

Show notes
This conversation with artist Richard James Hall was recorded and broadcast for the Slack's Radio residency as part of Blazing New Worlds at the NewBridge Project in January 2022. 
Discussion topics include: 
    • performance art, drawing, creativity, video, Instagram Live, curating  
    • disability, autism, bodies, being queer 
    • engagements with other artists such as Sally Madge and Victoria Gray 
    • the arts in Newcastle upon Tyne and North East England 
    • being a member of NewBridge 

Image from Dick’s ‘Crossing the Summer River’ performance in 2016, photo by Arto Polus.
If you enjoy this chat, please give it a good rating and share it with a friend! 
Auto-captioned videos on YouTube.
Recorded using Zencastr on 19 January 2022 and Audacity on 8 February 2022. 
Edited by Paula Blair with Audacity. 
Music: commonGround by airtone (c) copyright 2018 Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution Noncommercial (3.0) license. 
Find more information, see episode transcripts and join our mailing list at 
Funding the podcast helps us improve the quality and provide more accurate transcripts and captions. Please support if you can at

hello and welcome to the audio facial cultures the podcast part eight year host Paul let Blair investigate different areas of film media at the arts and cultural production in this episode I am delighted to share with you a recording I am me it's with Newcastle based artist Richard jams hold for the Sox radio residency at the new bridge project a budget which you can find more information by following the links in the show notes wherever you're listening to this deck is a very dear friend of mine and a big supporter of this show and I've been wanting to do a recording with them for awhile so this was a really lovely way to go up by that and I'm really grateful to you you bridge and socks for the opportunity if you'll recall take featured on our special remembering Sally match episode last autumn and it's great night to talk said tech personally up by their own practice which is largely through process and performance arts and if you've been missing for a while you know that to bake and tracks if mine is live performance art so before I pass over to our past selves %HESITATION past pastels huge thanks to all our listeners and said are very generous benefactors over at Petri on dot com forward slash AP cultures all of you thought make doing this and my very busy January with all of these recordings furry purse while if you love what I'm doing with the show and she can't manage to support the work financially I'd really appreciate it a positive review and rating for every access a podcast and a based on your socials which also be rainy rainy appreciated I'm so grateful when people say that it really means a lot but if you can manage even just a one off if you quit I'd be so grateful for that you can see that so radically on our lovely upgraded website funded by our patrons audio visual cultures dot com where you can also sign up to our mailing list to receive our free monthly newsletter Anthony episodes notifications streets to your inbox as well as access transcripts and generally get more information and thanks for everything to do with me on the show so %HESITATION finale before you run off and deal of science I want you to really enjoy this insightful talks with Dick James hall I know I really enjoyed all my talks Richard GM's hall thank you so much for joining me thank you so much for inviting me Pola it's great to catch up so my first question would you be happy T. describe your practice for everyone in the short term I would say I am a performance artist based in Newcastle upon Tyne the longer way about two days I'm a performance artist who also does I think kinds of whack on the side and has come from a tradition of improvised sectional performance but also realizing and having to think about now the factor of how much being on the autistic spectrum being clear being fast teams and affects myself and the world around me it's a very strange questioning them having to go for you and I'm constantly questioning myself which makes it very hard to think about projects and to be honest practice supplies some just like taking it day by day week by week yet I yes it's a really long time gentle point about that's about how I would describe my practice so follow me thanks I've had the privilege of being able to see your live performance and the before times when it is safe to gather but I also really enjoy aids over the lock time periods here experimental weapons say performances on Instagram life and I think those are where you really explored a lot of those kinds of same set you just flagged off their bite identity and taking up space and moving through space yes and playing with all Jackson just the life work but doing it to where it's calmer and I really enjoyed that a lot as well as those what else specifically would you say you've been working on recently and I think we can be very elastic about what we mean by Yuri sends a header what else would you say if the marking on because I know you do a lot of drawing as well I was doing a lot of touring and I kinda Hey this sort of roadblock because recently about a few months ago I was invited to do my fast performance the audience and %HESITATION via free is actually for no trace without resistance which was a memorial offend for the late great Sally mad shit and for that I was in a lab coat which I had to order in because I thought about wearing Sally's lab coat she was very very much smaller move me so %HESITATION Denton alab coach and that's not code seen some action button days before that offense including doing a trip from shields field on the bus where all the people that go in like keep away from me from the testing site %HESITATION I'm in the middle of town going through old charity shops because I was looking for China plates and China tea cups and all that %HESITATION center Johnston also a fantastic performance artist and I'm just like going through each charity shop going like no no and I'm ending up with this bunch of plates and all this trainer and I'm like going is this right it's cold cold trimming my S. but on foot up on the day itself I had a lint roller I had a few lane troll is some fine French chalk and I'm just proud of the day I was just rolling this Lynch rolled over the fan use cinema scenes because the venue itself is the star channel cinema and I'm just rolling away trying to cover up best hand the little bits of fabric you know about that slapped behind from use and it was interesting actually saying how much of the past is picked up by this this Dastis Moscow time which was very much a tradition that Sally match basically use within have practice which was to pick up on the mundane things and just celebrated so I did that for about five hours in terms of other things apart from being filled with some sort of mysterious bacterial and viral infection I saw a really interesting piece of performance work by another artist called Victoria gray no actually wrote it's very rare that I write in response to artworks but this one just struck me because she actually was addressing being on the autistic spectrum and actually being recently diagnosed as being on the autistic spectrum which was really interesting to me and as I'm writing is an essential stuff and I re read it I'm going %HESITATION I'm picking up on stuff that I have experienced that's a few people who I have known have also experienced so in a way my practice is fairly elastic and recently I've also been waking up on the soldiers soft practice launch of a survey of seven matches where at parks docked was trying to install some heroic in waves stat isn't academically structures all institutionally structured but actually played about with SS you are the artists so I've been piling up cuddly toys into the corner of the room I've been trying to stand up cushions which demand select B. fold down benches constantly having this on off discussion about how certain things come alive with the artist's touch robin and perhaps the curatorial touch in Newton so I've been having a bit of discussion with a couple of other people about that about terminal the curators meant to care about classic and yet it's us the artists who actually seem to be showing the most cash and the most dynamic form of cash which is to actually bring to life those wax which was so enormous and also think about how it is the pro sets itself that brings those works to live it's not just like an institutional taxonomy saying process but that's a very this is also lead you can tell I've been doing an MA and hung around PhD student quite a long time because I have that critical for process that's really useful insight actually %HESITATION I really appreciate those ideas I think that's a lovely way of putting it as well as the idea of taking care of the arts not just putting it somewhere in San Mart like slicing no backseat carrying forests and the kitchen she's talking about it especially because they're fragments of fabric that Sally painstakingly closets together and they've been washed up on the shore so who knows where they came from and that speaks of clothes and things you know so they're very human I think her intention was to give some some sort of dynamism and slice and sterile different shapes and sizes just like humans are and there are no billion there by Katie and %HESITATION to silence some bets and just like humans are and they're coming apart sure there you there so soon together they're awful tough it's really wonderful to hear that you've been able to play with those and have thought life experience because I think that's where the passive performance already come site as when you play with things and you have the opportunity to play and sometimes that the material the G. and you facilitate rather than forcing it into something I think that's the key part of any sort to improvise ation %HESITATION performance practice it's all fine and well having the infection diet DHEA but sometimes you have to let yourself be led by the materials besides the people around you yes very much in a dynamic state it's very hard to actually stay static I had my is some artists who actually had to generational static way back but it's just so slow that the melts happens I've tried that once for an hour I couldn't do it I haven't got the practice or the patience for it I'm very much like a ten gentil practitioner eight eight something catches my interest %HESITATION I'm kind of old to okay that sounds really childish in a way that it's just my way of going about it I like the dynamism I like to be invigorated somehow but of course there's also moments where you have to take stock and you have to stand back and actually trying to go like this is no time to Lolo it's do you find that these are quite and cheered us processes C. just really listen to yourself and see what you need today or how much do you allow yourself to you to what extent the G. plan something before you go into S. or GHS have an idea and you see what happens I would say I have an idea it's very read that I has the overall vision of something it's much mall on the emotional scale for me there's no hard structures to really work with apart from perhaps the site itself there are some things you just can never fall so change you can't change your environment entirely without great pains to do so okay your materials there's a level of care with materials but there's also a level of understanding that once you do something destructive you basically kind of took away some fence original intent and you have to live with that and you have to clean up after that I flinch from experience that you have to take responsibility as a performance artist that in a way that you are having show cat to the site to the materials or understand that there is consequences once you destroy the materials people around you because people are unpredictable and there may be times where you may have to shift out a little bit from performance from one performance state to another state to react to another person who may be in the audience at the end of today yeah I also have to care for yourself because it's some nice and well when you have other people supporting you but sometimes when you're actually by yourself as I have been throughout some of the experimental Wednesdays and fraud some of the experiments of had done in public ground wax before you are basically having to take care of yourself and I understand what you need to do to recuperate all what you need to watch out full so there's a responsibility to the play as well and I feel like that's something I'm growing into because when you're young you're sort of slap dash thank god I actually was in a workshop ones and this kids basically interest was going off on one ninety actually was just like destroying everything around him and asked the end defense because we let them go through this let him do what he did and at the end of it I just basically said to him in a way that was so exciting I have been in that place I have been in that destructive area but you have to be away and now that your destruction has caused the fact around you so in a way I was kinda kicking is I'll spend an assaultive caring way and I was trying to show a level of cab actually kind of going like I'm kicking your house right now but only because I want you to let but it because some people don't do that turned and maybe one of the few people to actually step up to the plate to go and make active in the market for yeah so thank you Spain a member of mu Prich for awhile but she sent me that there might be anything you've learned from being part of the French or any experiences you've had particulars Newbridge or is there anything you can reflect on a plate to share experience of being a member I would say as of any studio situation it varies from studio to studio I've been in some tight knit studios where I'm sharing one room with may be for artists or maybe sharing this massive garage with eight to eleven artists with no boundary points and it's interesting to me how new bridge festival in Laos the boundary space so that Joe's studio is your studio and that's something that's in some ways I've really crave tunes because I'm quite a messy studio hold I'm not eighteen Messi I had one studio member years ago and it was that this was the last straw for me we had a shed fridge need basically the last wild mushrooms in the fridge for about a week and when I open the fridge it's like no no well I actually had to get everything out to die frage check out the mushrooms and tried to clean up drive entire fridge and it still smells of mushroom sold the bleaching of acted I concluded it just was like nope bad smells not going what I'm finding less new bridge is for the fact that even for you may have separate studios there's still a community which I really appreciate I'm talking to artists who have just graduated from university and I'm like trying to get them like the little things look like yet try to keep you practice separately studios so you can at least keep up the momentum because we're meant to people who do with Todd courses and then they don't continue to practice you kind of lose the momentum any other use the want to box if you don't keep the practice up but it's interesting as well having talked in whack with members of staff at new bridge as well there is a level okay and there is a level of wanting things to change both within the studio settings but also in the wider spectrum of the community over the last few years especially since I've only came into new bridge September twenty nineteen and there's been times when members of that community has actually supported me when I have been at my lowest lows actually had her back to give me a call of a lockdown ones Rebecca Huggins I rector of new bridge and she basically just wanted to check in on me that's something that I don't think a lot of institutions usually do and I think that shows the amount of cash that's Newbridge shows towards since member is but of course sometimes members also push the lack a little bit and new bridge won't be afraid to choose basically co sought to shed her %HESITATION don't leave your stuff ready for us in this to start fires well I feel like it's also like it's a mix of training ground for recent graduates but also it allows space for older artists to work in a studio setting amongst the community especially with hollow space is a premium now especially in cityscapes and heads of studios outside of the city but it's usually people who have a little bit more money well a little bit more know how about how the infrastructure work ethics and I'm not quite at that place now financially or know how to actually kind of have a space outside yes but I really appreciate new brands on that level it's just a nice space it's somewhere where I would recommend any recent graduates to apply for especially if the local based I was wondering if you have any thoughts about aids the arts in new castle quite generally and across the northeast region that you'd be happy to share I mean you mentioned for example you branch being in shale fields and that's quite a recent maze and premises in the city centre but do you have any thoughts about it but the art scene so I can see what it's like in the city and in the region I would say Newcastle as to not seem itself is a fairly tightly nets group so there are times where there are people who I see two artists who I recognize but I don't quite know of but there's always that sort of thing off when you're walking down the street and you see somebody in your chest notes from the scene and you just give them the slight tilt open knowledge just to kind of go like I see it and because I'm not entirely beneficial me because sometimes if I don't get to tell took the note back when I gave the tilt of the knowledge back and it's like just like for the audio that was two flips of the birds that I think it's well in terms of new castle it is a little bit of a struggle at times because the northeast as a region has always kind of struggled with the odds because we've always been seen as like the leftover region in England itself if anything there are some people in other regions of England who actually consent to Newcastle in northeast actually be heart of Scotland yes so this these questions of like winter we'd be better off if we were in adopted by the Scottish oh do we have to really fight hard to win full funding but it's also back case of new castle has some of the free weights actually experimental work in because economically rent here is not too bad it's actually fairly cheap compared to some of the regions where it's small popular to live and it is it has produced some really great artists of the is what I'm finding as well as some of the great artists that I know of unknown only locally in this the likes of Carol Luby and Sally match for example who they're artists who are locally known and that my it locally but outside of the region it's very much like a nobody quite knows and I find that quite shocking I actually went down to the life of development agency in London I tried to type performance artists from Newcastle upon Tyne there was very little info we have a very rich history of performance and experimental %HESITATION it's shocking but it's also not shocking at the same time and you have to take it as it is you kind of have to take the fact to roles you can have a practice here but you may have to explore outside of the region itself just to get back in touch I will say people from Newcastle have a very good sort of hockey communities well we love to celebrate our own when one of our own actually succeeds in something well like yes yes and when maybe against attrition or something let sit self down what kind of like going gods why and they coasted with any sort of tight knit community there's also like a bit of gossip and chatting behind people's backs and it's even done lovingly or it's done with a bit of exceeding it even today anything like contact him sure well I'd like to spend a little bit team now and again okay so the laugh I'm not afraid to basically say to some people I have said to some fairly successful mid career artists bullshit I'm not afraid because I'm now at the point I'm very five I know I'm not going to be like famous all have the money I'm just being honest to myself to the community around me and also just kind of go in like time is precious if you're not going to be honest it sometimes leads to bad situations where is the honesty itself can actually be quite transporters and can help take away some of the egotism the one thing I will say is we can probably do a little bit more criticality but in the sense of kind of going like what being critical but in a supportive manner and I have said some things which I probably put me in the back big swells fewer people %HESITATION I've had a few conversations with curators just kind of going like really but it's just life I love it here it's the one place I feel the most me acts as I tried doing it down in London and London does my head in London's a place I know I have to visit at least may be recall kind that make I knew I had to visit the least once a year because it's just the way of the Welton but if I could help it I wouldn't go down Sutherland as much but %HESITATION I trying to also bring news of new castle to go outside of the region and just kind of go like come yes hello my pipe and done that's medic to pay you just have to scratch the surface a little bit and not be afraid of because sometimes we'll hang about in some of the dingy pilot sometime as well and just be like it's not this bad doesn't let X. I had one taxi driver tried to pick me up once a bank at me just was like well it's Raphael lake and I was like have you been in battle your chest list anywhere like that like I just went it's not that rusty and free and come through Russia places before and I'm just like this is a very thank you so much for this where can people find out more about you and your work query to point them towards online you can look me up on Instagram at St James hold because people also call me desk I call myself sometimes mistake mistake made today one day I hope to be doctor did they also and website I has W. W. dots judge James whole duct weekly dot com you might just want to type in Richard James hall artist of it and just give it a go that's what you know you're on the right page when you see somebody who's just like quite fast with long head and the first images like trust me I'm a slow going like the electorate for folks thank you so much thank you son upset pleasure I always love our tasks and it's not brilliant to have this proper a more formal chat with each day and I really appreciate it and I hope you have a lovely rest of your day thank you so much I hope to get disposable tea with you say please it Hey right I just wanted to see extend my thanks to check again for thanks and I hope that they'll return so that we can go into a lot more detail on a lot of those issues three is there because I think there are things that we started to touch on that merit a lot more dapps but I was recording this for quite a tight time slots so it was a fairly concise conversation so I thought I'd just take the opportunity nine AM I'm recording this in February doing a bit of time traveling because that talk was probably set the thirty year it was originally recorded in January around mid January %HESITATION as early as February and yeah it's really nice opportunity actually there are some Bach over these and reflect on them a little bit and take out some ideas on how you to maybe develop some more of these themes and issues that are coming up across these episodes the next one is going to be the third of the recordings that I did for the S. with Bethany stats so that's a really lovely conversation as well so please stay keep subscribe and then check out our latest file yes so I just thought I'd take a minute because that has been a fairly short bonds is just perfect about more and some of the observations I think there's a lot of crossover here with the professional and the personal three some of the things that tech was referring to there I'd really like take knowledge that we seem a bit snappy up by arch curators and more formal and institutionalized approaches to presenting wrecking galleries and exhibitions I mean I try to be really open minded but you know sometimes is laptop and I stepped up in this one of bets and probably come across is but negative and part G. T. not to create practices we encounters are Ryan the commemorative events for Sally match that we mentioned and those events took place in November of twenty twenty one and I just wanna be radiate beauty care every single person who works in all of those events in the exhibition and everything we all contributed to our time for for a the curators particularly that so out quite great personal cost to themselves and it was hugely stressful under very challenging circumstances I'm very limiting circumstances as well but on the other side of that they also didn't listen to the wishes of those of us who actually worked directly with Sally's pieces and I felt that they made some presentation decisions that they thought looked nice looked as good as they kids and the space that they were given but I think there were others of us he felt that these particular presentations of specific things were missteps I am being deliberately vague here I'm not naming things directly I'm not going to name many people I just felt that you know there were quite a few of us who have a lot more knowledge and understanding of the contacts the rind a lot of the work and physically works with them as well I did a lot of finishing of Sally's unfinished pieces not just me other people that that sort of work as well so there is a lot of very invisible labor that went behind getting the pieces ready for exhibition and also for Sally's physical archives and I just felt that the missteps and hi some of these representatives and the gallery it probably should at a potentially negative lights if your roof year he came in cold and you really engaged actively with the pace and sought its rate I don't think you have come to a very positive conclusion so again I'm being really vague but if you witness center if you seen images of it you might be able to work out what I'm talking about yes but I'm not gonna talk about it directly and there is a little bit of my thinking on this because I I do I wrote a blog post thinking three and she's around part labor and not something I've talked I talked at length with Sally about eats there's also a particular thing that happens with something I mean it's that I posted on my end my personal Instagram page so if you want to go to a gang you're welcome to go and hunt for those but I'm not going to thanks to them directly as I say I don't want to name any names and I don't actually think it's first ready to piling on too much and this is probably I hope the last probably talk about it thanks bye everybody who was involved contributed to with the opposite passive intentions and this isn't hello I think it's worse dying on edge is what I will say I think it's more it sparks rather than the personal it sparked more of an intellectual curiosity about art the upper and the worst of work and those are two things again all things I talk to bite off miss Holly and I keep bringing up on this podcast nobody seems to be getting the message not enough people are listening to %HESITATION maybe maybe everybody less since this gets the message and I need more of these people to listen and get the message so what I would like to say is that I would like to see more respect and consideration for art laborers are two workers and recognition that an artist might have their name on something but they don't necessarily make the work on and Sally's case that was different because she died she was making the work herself and then she died and so a bunch of us finished at or did something less the things that were and transaction but it's something I was thinking out about it a lot anyway with Sam you know sort of more bigger Anne am CMS artists he got loads of money thrown at them or make use of money in the right Sally wasn't one of those people but even still even just out workers doing that Leah Byrne but you I give a lot of my summer last year to doing the work of putting these pieces together and finishing things and I don't care about recognition but what happened in my case was that something of mine was actually destroyed so it's not to stop it you know I don't care about being raised in carpet being visible but something I actually made it and dead with my bare hands was destroyed in the process of this is the way it brandy spun me on a train of thought of thinking about partly uppers and our keepers here at once the CM mass and distinct from artists so this is an issue that was presented front and center and so much of Sally's work to the point that she did performances for what she need pen badges that sads flux worker on them and that was specific to you when she was responding three performance to the flux this retrospective oil tank and two thousand nine and this was a performance that perished but tech was talking about right there an artist's caring for other artists work to really extremes quite funny extremes but also she was provocative of thought and I'll link to some of that work in the show notes and so %HESITATION and turn that's what a few of the state for Sally spark in the year following her death we cared for her work I felt for a person a Costa Sally when I was working with her pieces you know I would have her some of her cations sitting on me while I closed them up and stop is very meaningful because it felt like a kid how good this thing that was part of her and it was very personal but that's not the peace and I'm really talking about aids I think the thing that was really hurtful for me on a personal level was set at an embroidered dedication of very small embroidered dedication I had put on one of the really large pieces I had made artistic bets Sally never called tape was baptized with light me being notified without being asked I turned up to the opening night and I saw that it was gone and I thought I was going mad and on the I had taken a photograph of it at home before I gave it away I knew I wasn't going completely mass on it I had actually so nice then on it was just wrapped ice I was completely gone it wasn't even discovered over it was just gone and so I think there's quite a few here sis because obviously it was personally a bet on the front but then it also files a lot more generally like in the front seat the visibility of the art worker and merging from the artist's shadow and this was something solely did quite a lot and her art she laid bare the process of the worker Ryan to making art if you listen back to my episode with her one of her performances cold making a mass and cleaning it up her whole performance is a bite you know she doesn't aren't working as pages and then most of the performance is actually her cleaning up the mess that she's made for the performance so there's a collapse of the artwork in the art labor and then what is performance and what is just cleaning up the collapse into each other and a very very tiny way this was something I was referencing was just to making the work Abed visible and mine of AC isn't terribly powerful and I wouldn't call him anything like that but it's just in my own little way doing something that I think Sally may have approved often that I discussed with her quite a bit not any other layers thought is that embroidery and needlework are considered as Croft's rather than art again this is something that has come up in the podcast before if you go back to one of our earlier episodes while Coulthard crafts this is something that me and my gas and not absolute talk about it at length as well as what's processes what methods are even considered to be arch so my hand stitched embroidered writing wasn't considered art by these curators and I mean I don't know they're thinking about it because I haven't spoken to me and that's that's part of the problem is that they've never communicated with me I spoke to them on the opening night before I had to realize what had happened and it just even speaking to them for a few minutes it was really clear that the result law they didn't know up by the pieces that I and another person had finished and the pieces that I it by myself had me it's the richest so much detail they didn't have and they have my email address I am easy to reach him easy to find I picked myself all over the internet I'm not hiding anywhere folks again there's a lot going on there so I don't want to just when you bite it too much but yeah so it got me thinking about eight not just for me in a personal level but for just those larger questions I think about it he gets to be an artist walk gets to be an artwork what gets to be an art pro sass you know I think we're still not answering those questions adequately with Sally staff there is no I. another lock and he is asking those questions through the work itself three the process itself and so I suppose I just really wanted to hot spot on because the remains no consensus on high any of these things can really be property defines and he gets said to find not and I suppose a presented us with the fact that there is still very stringent can't keep bang of the bi injuries Orion's creative practice creative practices and so I thought I would just sit through those extra observation site there and just ask you to think about I thought for a bit so thanks if you've listened to my little extra rumbled huge thanks again C. deck I hope that that's gonna stop by to my system thank you for this

Audiovisual Cultures episode 114 – Vane with Paul Stone and Chris Yeats automated transcript

hello and welcome to the audio visual cultures hi I'm Paul left in there thank you for joining me for another foray into the world of media arts and culture this conversation was originally recorded as a contribution to the Sox radio residency at the new bridge project a new bridge is an artist's studio gallery and project space in Newcastle upon Tyne and the north east of England's more information about all of that is linked in the show notes wherever you're accessing this episode's along with lots of other useful links a bite to taste casts I'm really pleased to present this longer cuts of my chats with directors of V. N. pol stone and Chris units he generously talk through some of fans history as an artist led organisation and gallery and its recent necessitated may from Newcastle city it's heads we also talked about the impact of the pandemic as well as the lingering ramifications of the T. Tyson its economic crash and I just all of these things have affected the arts psychology and funding and everything quite generally hopefully by the time this episode releases there will be firm our plans that we can share a bite what twenty twenty T. is looking like for fan which significantly has its twenty fifth anniversary in the summer do check our socials for that we are AT cultures pods I'll probably be doing a lot of sharing of what fan are up to date I know as I record this certainty on Instagram they're sharing past exhibitions that they want to highlight from the past twenty five years do you check them by their fee and calorie wherever you're taking foreign socials as ever a huge big massive thank you you too all our listeners fortune and then answer all of our very generous patrons at Petri on dot com forward slash AP cultures for keeping us going as you'll hear in this episode it's a really tough climate for all areas of arts and the creative industries just nine and a big message coming out of this conversation is the arts are non negotiable and we need to fight for them we need to fight as well for her arts criticism I always keep coming back to see the conversations I always had was solidly match appoints folly and worse so I really hope that and if you're listening can take away some messages safari around the sayings and that we can really start to push back on the cuts were facing an arts and humanities education and the arts and culture sector for now I am going to pass you over to Poland Chris it's reedy radian site file hope you get a lot I defend I hope it does give you some food for thought and we can really figure out how we can make our best friend Paul stone and see it thank you so much for joining me for the S. hyphen really came to speak to both surprised fan for some time and I'm just delighted at this socks media residents say giving me the excuse to finally jump and then to give you both the Shiites the Syrian was established in nineteen ninety seven and I think it C. H. and the timing of that is something we might talk about a little bit but Kitty chief he and turned describe your roles as directors and maybe a bit of your own history with B. N. O. tri poll first and then move on to crest so be nice to get the voice attached to damn sis while I say %HESITATION I'm told I'm the creative director of Bain and I'm also gonna tie rack to choose kinds of direct summoned director bangs company the old side %HESITATION great start speeds and chalk Graham the sole saying many of the things they send you to this in your organization startup challenge talks between us the point is to decide is that it didn't actually sets banging up with those involved from the very early days and since I'm from express to the public manifestation everything is kind of thought into this role rather than you know it wasn't a job that I applied for because there was no joke start with helps creates the joke we're not backgrounds and since the northeast as I came here as students in the late eighties I went to North America which I have a BA and MA in fine all fine despite this is not just after graduation lodging mice and stuff I was doing was outside the region one of the things that led me to come and vote in organizing projects and become a trusted name when it was set up was the fact that there weren't many opportunities for artists in the northeast so we decided to make all right basically all right Chris all the time right just saying we are obviously a small organization but we have a long history I will was involved from the initial steps back in the nineties I was actually it also student at Northumbria but I was doing my MA and I found out this was an organization promoting normalization group of artists not just used to meet on a regular basis and pumps on the city center and we were really just talking shop people just get together and discuss the work and it was first mooted at one of those meetings back in ninety six that'd be good to have a grassroots event it was at that point that we decided to kind of what would be called a festival but it seems a venture round the city affection that became strained ninety seven the first thing thanks was it was it was a way of actually creating opportunities for artists in the area we always wanted to do something which showcased what was going on it was it was an open access is not so it's going to be obnoxious to any any %HESITATION two stocks were involved just say I'm just I'm actually from the northeast originally so when you counsel I've moved all over the country so I got to get my first degree down college sitting in MA a relatively light sentences choose student I suppose at nothing but it was way back into my practice is at that point she done any organizing the other shows so that was a big move I think that was moved over to the dark side okay as a group producing web select but it knows only van offense the first four from nineteen ninety seven to two thousand both caught myself did participate as artists later on we moved to sack not really going to appoint that's enough for the world about me that's okay Sanchi it's really great said here more papers if you're back crimes because you do so much facilitating of so many other artists so it's nice to have a bit of the spotlight on each TV I think in case there's anyone listening he doesn't know very much about eight A. N. hi E. G. thank everybody best describes nice are you giving us a nice idea of the history of high it emerged by hiding his head being operating Grady said Stan is quite difficult questions one that sort of constant eight Texas so do not just cases I mean it's not longer story could cost you see results of the developments in the outlook examining some of that over this year because we're doing a lot of work on the knock on so global data sets this kind of sort of mold on two faces divine this is been a long process but to answer your question we started out we called ourselves not just that organization that is crisp wanted out because we when it became more of a job as an admin I'm developing payments which you didn't at the beginning research aside from not this office now we more recently this is possible working through decades a couple decades we've beginning to defuse the phrase office that again we're not sure I'm working on just because we feel that that is a good description of what we do and it never really wasn't the case spot iron artistic practice might just put on the back burner as he became boss everywhere organizes curates as soon as ISIS we're not sure that's always been very very much Cole how we approach this a project is the times being an artistic practice that is a long conversation about what is autistic watches and you use it he doesn't we've been very much involved in the world and by me throughout thank you St city of deciding what the best model for us cells Wallace is always been very much picking and choosing what we thought were the best bet some of the models means that are eating their guidance when we set up from the licensing process in network I'm still looking things to die and not more so it is interesting to us either that's something that we should be working as well whether it be looking at stuff and saying that's what shouldn't be happening you know what we do is such a good reaction because that's part of the process is still to formulating what we do move anybody comes out so it's a decision I really lost during the time that it also comes in which the public profile like lots of places because we've been open classes until such relocates nastiest US secretary print so it's almost like we re imagined now what is that and using the title let's say this whole sordid bites not readable is office that we should use it the people should be using lots of going back to history of how old the sort of what if you want to call it a group that would be impossible around the U. caning the paroled unless things start up Oxlade I would argue not radiologists that anymore because they become institutionalized one thing that runs through paying nothing Kay is a resistance to being institutionalized not serve challenging place to be in because it means it's not just a sort of Stalin's successor purist on cementing light box if you pay the price stocks as well as in like if you don't take certain routes you know you will get money for certain things I mean we do get some money for things that you know it keeps you in a certain neurons lands in some cases the banks sector releases such as my son overground to say isn't it in resistance what was happening at the time and I think there's always been a little bit of a gentleman be spiking a set that is almost like sitting in a straight night refusing to do things in a certain way not just sheer bloody mindedness that just because I actually think that's a different way to do it what is almost been reluctant to use one of the terms of we don't so we don't think of myself as curates such neither was a come from a formal Q. rating background since our June the PMA in that subject we've always taken the parts of the world in order to facilitate something is about to turn for what we do and that we never really have a presented a sort of heavy handed approach he said this is the team this is what you're going to do I mean we do we have put shows together just seems but would also allow the boxes the room about not so it's never been a question of we have to tell you to what was done in terms of obviously there are we talking actually how we assist in certain ways but we we've never taken our very very heavy handed this is the socks into it that makes the program is directed by artists yes so that's kind of who gets too great a focus leads down to a number of things that we some that's proactively submitted by exit why does some bits comes to us from what I've heard anything from direct proposals to you maybe negotiation every years of people saying what about this idea so it's values you know I'll let live open to not stand can be minimal to quite major not where the level when he publicly viewable I'm not gonna talk about CD cases this is not meant to be a suspect is not an ego driven yeah duration even if we also involved a correction center definitely think about stocks that thing it means the pregnant friend much is when we work on it and likewise the other discount when working on Saturday shows which took lots and lots of guns in those things come very much is that almost finished products some of them are a lot more loosen on phones and I dare make you work the top kind of artists in more detail in this again that's not to say visible from the outside and neither is it meant to be because it's not about and neither my training it sort of all this open free for all because it's not all anger started like that it is not now we took a long time beating away from now I mean it's kind about trying to do the guiding role then yes imposing there's also some of the changes that will say %HESITATION external ones that ask you do you receive money offices sent things that that sort of expected I don't mean that we do things we don't want to that's not true but again it's not just a sort of personal space I think from the outside we get this clock nothing less people artistically you know kind of thing this set that will die scratching our chins and sums up from down to people's work and it's just so far from the truth whatever you got full stop %HESITATION it's about you know points to five percent of the time it's not I think I mean you know how to say no to a lot of really good things yeah we would really like to date there is you know I mean anything supplied was accidentally gender singing there's no obligations have sort of balance and look outside of our own experience backgrounds incentives it's contents the program negative deal that we did that comes from people I mean but we approach people some of the times people kind of not shy approaching us I mean I think says it's it's it's question moving beyond our own personal tastes about taught me one thing when we try and let me do it it definitely is having this kind of tokenism and the way we program we're very aware of all the debates and ideas all the interested parties what we do it we do it in a when we program in a very %HESITATION and it's passed away it's it's we have our own flavor that we want to get to them as we have our own ideas about it but we we want just to give the artists in the most conclusive way so we want to give them that freedom and that actual voice such a very conscious of being Pachter topic if you open a pick a well actually when I just go over every inclusive in that sense no we not we wouldn't show web that we couldn't stand behind it might not be specifically talk personal texts such a certain nations of what that means you know changeover times I'm wrong it will recurring thing over Baynes longer lifespan now is that the certain things you can say kind of mission or whatever there's been constant from the very beginning things actually taken many folds I mean typically I think I've lost unions grad also wanted to debate about access to but also things that exactly suited within the art world what is it doing shows what should be long long to send email nope not anymore network us on analysis where you actually get the gallery space the last time the weather actually talking to a high concept curated shows whether you're talking about having a group the actually on salt is whatever reason that involving creativity on the looking for space show where what they does is give the space those people yes that would be disingenuous to say that's no kind of negotiation about schools I mean also distant things come gone do for whatever reason would be that society schools complete character but I mean space out trying to get that person talks articulate what they're doing as best as possible with helping them but not trying spokesman gonna be coming up with what he's going to sensitive institution I'm thinking of people sitting in the huge pressure institutionalized itself right now right we have to wait for me to even talk about buying this organization when it's two people to the contrary I think between themselves doesn't work like the stock may be breaking into someone's on your show every now and again yeah I was hoping it again you can make a whole series about what is access we are seeing a random choice seeing as an institution by some people outside because we've been around so long and especially serving abroad this was just that however that would come with you I mean one of the things that's famous founded on walls because when it was just like what you just because you see stuff all the time %HESITATION you know take over not just have a shot I will put you working great but yes things do not solicit I mean the reading walls back in the dog days of nineteen ninety six I mean the fewer calories full stop to be a local law to stand I mean was largely dominated by stock that one of the two universities in New yeah not a great northeast about the wish I was you know when it was new castle the new castle group it was also told that Univest outside the academic system yeah I was not %HESITATION whether student groups result she bangs early beginnings very much grew from adults you get groups not seeded ridge properties we think off now things I knew pretty things are not these are I mean lots of pains it's based because also meant to sound like a dog cages you know when you talk about nineteen ninety six after member that will be but since G. save Georgia people didn't have an email or by about that's true so when talking about how people networks it wasn't doing things that what we're doing now it wasn't great and what's not its stock from that network is a machine that is about the monthly meetings and pups the stock physical thing was the only real at the lychee hops get they haven't used to bring that equipment that welcome all right disposed to cross the web connection right it was very different well yeah you know to the house you know how's it look downsides because again it was I don't know I don't know really what's complete crap to contents networks difficult extends to students about the good for the people there and that is all kinds of ways you should exclude people not deliberately and consciously and not something you just need to keep looking out windows meetings become people came to the book once a week in the evening we have the high room well either we sat down beside stone decisions you know I mean when the hands up in the attic not %HESITATION is a hell of a lot of it is also a lot of sort of mythology around offices let's stop being Democratico collective you know I mean it's it's fine in some instances in other instances not the story of Bangor went boy will this intricate details of it I have the space to do for five years before we had the gallery about you having to go we call be making these decisions with their thirty white folks every time at some point if it's to progress beyond we came from his reaction to the not being any opportunity we created opportunities eight people called greatest opportunity but then actually you get to another level where do you go next actually to go somewhere next so more great it has to be in charge yeah all we stay right where it was a big debate I mean I haven't really talked about yet in an ice my set up when the national lottery started in the early nineties the funding they also not there's a year or something up until the year two thousand you took out of the office so those year architectures year it shouldn't see the different city or region in nineteen ninety six the north east of England and Cumbria at the so the last official gonna celebrations it's not a lot of big name artists logic or shoot it and you should construct some which I was also as it neared Pontificio program also there's lots of different stuff now based off the nice guy second because it actually grew out of the discussions officer having in ninety six and how bout they all she wants to do something but there's some there's also done something in ninety six is sort of cringe cylinder refuse I against that of what was happening in ninety six or just not really against what was very nice it just actually please look at this as well yeah name is actually always step in that was kind of bit ram truck will start with always walls about looking at longer term you do still strikes away saying let's build something that kind of exist whatever reason it was kind of funding legislation so mice the the wall so I did it on the band's eggs and breakfast was still doing it says very nice and very nice it rain or something two thousand it's a long story short kind of went from fifty artistic not seven largest banks yeah I was do you guys think about my time goes two thousand fifteen eighty exhibitions in two months and two hundred office largest antique shops should taking over not consult with one of the cycles of generation your customers lost and shops you know it's it grew into this monster almost well yes very good a real kind of another thing that people don't notice much now well because this generation and I'm looking I'm just looking archive there was actually told that about well it's got so successful back to commerce you can keep doing this we could do it every year Lasker citizen participation actually while he was going to do it we went to me we were either not working on the doll all working part time things not not mean anything it reached a point of stopping also I was you know going from my background and yeah I think it served its purpose yes Sir %HESITATION that thing was well actually what is going to come next and not short came most species selected working with the people on the network I was talking about earlier longshots lessons of Morris you should come on things not to be confused with selected shows shows I am in the early two thousands before we actually extends side noodles into the face crying because when they're selected actually lost in the same office we can expect it each time I say much less at the gallery just be done with this kind of tending am to shops in Tempe spaces online %HESITATION undo that extends but hope to have that space for a few years without such what best served in Europe but also not you what brings in the beginning it's really time possibly months with the people that's going to do that sort of stuff I'm not and I'm no way I'm very proud of what we did what she traded in those first few years the improper hot and you have got some people don't understand the impact it's actually I don't what's existence right such they encourage it some of the benefits what we know what we did was our claims knows original set before we did it by looking at examples what people to not sweat landfall not so I'm not you know just what I learned is being not to speak out shows between graduation before I became involved in organizing your life took those lessons and kind of find them seeing here is not the case is now in the northeast for the gun not training with the difficulty thinking invented the whole thing didn't well technically technology to do it you know they're the people that we met that will when talking about profit jumps and tricks you know great yeah I mean one thing that express scripts not Shaq United's shipbreaking minds to stick it out on the axis yeah it's easy to scrub his business sort of upwards trajectory not does not and it is absolutely amazing deed going from there's different faces another follower type yes we didn't do anything we're we're still working on stuff like I say people upset you can refresh and like that he does now that incident it's absent blues again I guess that's the thing with the loss of mythology around artists that still musters Randy's teaches about almost missed out will always wells lots of mythology it's always not project returns says don't really like to talk about I see that setbacks but things that we didn't follow through and things like that you know %HESITATION school was closed after recess just reassess what you're doing I mean one of the things we've never we've never wanted to be an out of which about with never being done didn't driven it that way so that's what we exhibit this talking possible avoiding being this institution you see it's the same people chasing the money as well I serviced and constantly just servicing Hyundai you see see off to see %HESITATION graduations ceasing to be what we started out the baby coming basically it is a service organization are you paying prices price but you don't know just how we can help you help your help on this front background overruled as much money yeah I mean that should be anymore but you know you just won't get to if you don't actually played smoke or we should it's %HESITATION the expectation more exhausted you don't stay with an organization dress that's gonna bounce an idea not defined as not just practice hello this is that because of the months I just love yes my name you know people I know people and the people that were there that he does things up other went off it was either you know they don't exceed state notwithstanding all could be directs this institution what's happened in public doesn't interest me inside the possibility that he twice as much as I do now miton trust me but you know how isn't good enough to want to make me go out and do that now you know and it's not because it's easy to stay where we are sitting not to use it because you know it was a huge amount of responsibility what we do on the very front child and I guess basically between bit fragile moment special counsel businesses across all the members are just going through such a terrible couple of years and well without wanting to dominate conversation instead of talk about I'm going to one of the things is that you might not think it to look after this good job good I'm glad to send you sound that actually you know dog we're very on child yeah it's kind of the thing you know when you're talking to clubs and things this is not the initiative on Cecil to institutional site that we have it's questioned all the time but one thing is like you're not actually come this terrible terrible things happen to the world of Luscombe yes actually my stupid that pretty quickly binding and does not without help from the people in the singing of the action without massive training measures to many things I mean I'm also not sustainable because actually yes because it's so flexible about saying what we we have gone through changes manage those changes as an organization I would say pretty well yes I'm showing accountability and then always I mean some of those changes it's about history changed from non venue based more value based way of a missile is being suspect is said to think well also conditions all the organization you know it's always been a mixture of choosing what we think is best what you what we think is best artistically mixed with some you know there's some properties and about you know where we are what we can do what we do have to because you have to base that recycles yes never not trust fund kids don't have that privilege use where it is very popular today about what we do you know I mean so some of those research taken hostage and forced by external circumstances again I'll see the last couple of years it's been the biggest of external circumstance content it myself which is also the kind of I'm not going to have to move my venue which was always going top wondering about two years guaranteed I mean I'm hoping that for decades it wasn't the best times of my speaker I'm not it was coming up more expensive and when you get you paid a big shots more than your open you realize how much you're paying service subspace so how do we scale down a bit of a base constitutes and size yeah that's practical side of it we need to actually see the town's got a bit because you know we've we as in the country of the world is never really recovered from top out of financial crash is now in years ago next month that we still stand still since then the amount of data was being brought up as a result of pandemic is scary the one that we repaid within our lifetimes there's not much there the magic from the guys coming and getting this moment it intends responding to the future we have to sort of take a mixed use of the choice again choice on external circumstances you know comes out today guessing the small manageable it's only been I am impressed on the see more of the last two years how much we need to survive on what we've got and make it more manageable size %HESITATION dot will give all minds for the new space is going to be still begin the spicy hot well the last month is now off their space needs to engage in the process of hiring yeah I've missed twice as big as the gallery Hans Hans two thousand five to two thousand eleven ways king's behind central station Newcastle where the new times degree in in that you know so much bigger and cheaper this thing about this new space this streamlining is aware that the fact that we won't be we're not servicing this building again it kind of opens up a whole new range of opportunities and an interesting right somebody's going back to the early days of greatness well so we could be more more reactive to taking up the empty spaces again during cop shows you know with it correctly now we just call it pop up shows come the pre gallery days we have a long list a different kind of flexibility because it's it it's opening up different kinds of changes working artists as well as your reservation but also we can re examine it can look at the changing role of the calories in the colors she teams up with the changing role within the community of artists and that we have talked about what becoming even more advantages knocks that sense of the that would not just this I could tell that one very much talk to these picket communities as these holdings connected communities beyond the is where the autistic community as well yeah research the choices of things that we were considering anyway more recent events jolted us into rethinking things I mean I've gone on about how we know institution we were becoming there's danger lastly you blink and sometimes watch some of the things you say enough to do happened you know nothing else is anything but then when in the midst of the lockdown balls going into work I'm looking at these big speech was not big by some people's standards we are quite big M. two gallery spaces and %HESITATION we couldn't do anything and that the relocation came into being on such as the logic let's not try to replicate this space also point to make it really is like this is always a sort of like questioning be pressuring yourself from yourself yes actually well next need to replicate what we did before not she does not use babies it's a chance to such decent difference not something not swapped again not entirely unique but also do brunch revise history but also resisting up thing about CBOE you've done this what she needs to do the same again make it bigger so who better to change I'm not really convinced on which the change that has been in the world I mean call me cynical but see this kind of idea of incremental growth and everything is not slay is actually incompatible the idea of staying ability with the talking the most obvious environmental what's up the hostages some might there's always something I know jump high jump high jump high and it's just not in terms of what resources it's conceiving whether it's actually your emotional resources you know chance yet you got out you know whether she's a physical results intense just like what we're doing to the comments section not just looking about what you what you want from life from night watch what's next thing to do because that's what we're going through this really quick for me is the world's first commercial accounts from feedback has been the subject of the processing the life work balance you know what we what we are what we're not going to be one to what we want the organization to be as well as changed all my thinking anyway you have to think about what you will say in the time this last not sounds great mobile it you have been there read read sensitive medical you know well you can think about you being back in about twenty five years cannot well it's not possible to cut its but yeah my doctor five more years left on this S. walk right well to do and I'm not gonna be retiring in and this is kind of what we'll do what you want in the next ten years twenty years I thought well is actually not not site already excluded myself from going off to another job they're also gonna say smaller than anyone thank you let me push it to mount you're welcome think about this now broadcast notes the name they say they're getting in the core of the yeah every and you know so what you what do you want people that we kind of like things also it's not really quite cheap site we with the solution something called the dressing what we sought to be see if problem is minor means a case I think now that everything's fine let's not talk about I'm done talking about what exists now I mean I still think there's still room for a different kind of voice yeah I could expand on that by really reluctant to talk about she said pointing fingers under what they got wrong well I mean it's just that that's just different kinds of challenges now this always comes the challenges with that twenty five years ago maybe not there anymore these different kinds of challenges that this still extricate to const if you like well that might just be different ones the ones they were attacked and you know people welcomes quite things that wasn't there long because you know people see what about getting that you call this success nine I will success is always kind of wired the expenses someone else because all admitted resources to go around we have some parts of those resources not so much of the people that you know I knew some of this was a basket with people saying what I could do that without such results the challenge to Wilson sorry are we doing that it's not the best because again not right but sort of talk that gets right it does yes Sir everyone I'm not seasons yeah on the night doing best the best best it's the best you end up talking to the press release talk you know and I don't think that's useful I think actually in a condo this is the best is actually in the basket I mean I hate among white I hate not compressed to sides of things yeah it's naive to think that would knock knock competing you pine for funding you're competing someone gets it someone doesn't and it's not simplest best person walks in memory is just not true of life and again asked me piss me off the record hello Mister people think holes in accurate honest people that think you know a more deserving I spent lots of time helping you know again it's not public this is what we spend a lot time hoping to strike operations not just officers showed great we can do about that put all your money on that number eight sometimes these things I mean you have to you have to be above the center level yes it's not just like a random but you know is that about on that we get it will help what level of blow up doll on stays is just just trying to be aware that the actually does a different way of doing things to the way you did them in a couple years ago it's not just occasioned by massive global brands like pandemics also actually down to more mundane things in fact the same exactly I think requirements establishment right I got trouble thought you too would not apply in certain areas in the northeast because I'm too outspoken about certain things that she does not apply to it once the decision making problems something more reaction to revise and I'm gonna leave it at that asking this is let's not look at it on Monday night but you know it's kinda well watching around my own %HESITATION without similar same not without some respects we wouldn't you know we are not council yeah but this is not a validating you know as a validation engineer from eagle point you wouldn't happen if people didn't look at the work that was produced in sight well some of the least is good how big he supposes farms our office is without box thanks doctor you never know resources other than energy energy of office hell's artist will douse it took out and it's still %HESITATION is heavy dependence on artists in the sense that spec also you work with it's not that co productions you know what side of the sensations when the creatures and the co productions but without so much about the actual web just happens when the people are just turning up and doing work without dots then we wouldn't have a reputation which is positive reputation all side but not the big public gallery it's not a bad not for all of the old uses me looking at that you know how we do stuff to do things in a very public in the early days you know them about small space is not marketing manager notification officer in back to times we do have groups of people coming through one thing positive things not reinstate said as we look at our next concert of expending Selectric March community and council as receptive to that sort of way this will be hot that's going to actually allow to meet people but yeah I mean also so awesome main audience good things are happening come to blows through artists yet wanting to but with this other than not sometimes we do I don't just mean not that people may not someone going away yeah look right I think that's the real dedication for us is that we help stocks reputations are understood to be honest it's an international reputation because of the profit is not without honor I mean we do house relatively large international reputation I mean this website just because they do cover the areas so time given I mean when we cited well they were just entering a new phase now I think I'm most obvious and when we sit around at the gallery phase if you live in two thousand five the full box yeah we invited artists to work with this and so there's also still working with this seventeen years later and so the office will also work with any projects and got some relationships going back twenty years mall synopsis other office near completion you gotta keep open so what we did approach this is a small cohort of international artists when we open the gallery let me pop up program also going on doing stuff outside of the gallery I mean this is also do not bend to thousand six of media outlets out there remains a not for profit organizations mean com make money I mean money up thank I. straight into I mean it's basically self what comes in goes out so who is taking off as people call had rounds of being not for profit levels and metrics commercial point is connection arms and money to run their organization was not strong but many still somewhere send me physically been doing much of the last two years and since then we have been doing online still working if you price and ropes across the square you know what you actually sign anything on dolls I mean it's good so the promotion for them and because it also houses well just because the office is quite expensive thing to do this is an international activity has created other kinds of opportunities for artists okay not just for artists that we've shown specific opportunities beyond even next to the chick in career change opportunity since it and that's a great thing for us to see happening I mean we're looking a little bit I mean happened tools reading much about because of twenty five years this option G. license it's not just on the best between starting imminently Ole miss out to John Ritter will stop people tend to generate we've been doing the pandemic against Jaitley said of like unity trolls are similar archive six days a year in more recent stuff picking stuff out making sure things are archived as can be on a website we can be doing stupid stuff on you know social media things are not looking at all the stories to try and save some of what we've been talking about will be expanded upon in nice and there's also a story %HESITATION everything that was in the past okay your short videos major processors and things I'm not certain that this man can be I'm gonna brought a hundred fifty or even not near to impossible the region daisy Boston shows the public we have been busy yeah understood nice is the recent official %HESITATION so too and what written document talking may sound a bit driver Transamerica it's not just the string is actually the history is very person nothing to to die they just need to find a man going about his office like well is this well not trying to draw that sounds it's not just not okay here's our archive is nice pictures exhibition did seventeen years ago it's M. O. Y. what was that if they were from outside Newcastle what they find you guys trying to us normal will sit by the way here things are but this is still very relevant today in a may reactivate what contextualizing not externalizing it both the benefit locals orients and I'm hoping for the peak is about sex going about so I did not well thanks it was it's another gallery on the next prompt got as well this is our story yeah and I'm not make qualitative judgements but with the battle with brokers say west anyone and I'm trying to say that better than anyone actually it's a different story yeah hi Sir different story this is John transplants on the how to get it beyond %HESITATION here's a press release for a leg to show us your bill not so silent and drawer out things crossed by time out to get the actual birthday this not about some physical events and I discussed these are not less camels which come together to do that you can have the benefit seeing me in person rumble age or something like that stage should have built a stage I'm not just talking for months so she's context I think not I think it's still questions based on about the same way we could what we did send certain things in the day yes looking back is also complete contempt contacts because right right yeah me chomping stands together what we're talking about those debates have gone away when you start out you can just like pushing pushing pushing pushing towards his back to world what sense basically maybe over dramatic did you ever come well that moment did you know certain things about that certain things certain things we probably contributes to grazing actually negative things for us now yeah yeah maybe drops calling again back to the very beginning we know we dropped going south sauce that one point when we first got the offer of more regular funding well now it's got so it was said it was it was a negative yeah a line of be professional in which is really a whole lot problematic surround that this happened today you're not straight you know then it'll sauces that straight around the stock should actually what Sydney along Hyundai can just mean showing your banks on the other hand you know your institutional constituting so lost actually sort of are you really any like Sam not gonna stop by I mean another thing Appleton's Constanten international presence not in the office to better route to adopt is primarily not even about taking calls and not such good routes to get yourself somewhere five days and showcase not just where to lots of people since the show was I think I see smoke and in New York right right yes I call you like guys Jakub might remember everything the things that they're not you mean outside about in multiple places but the space is two blocks but again it's all help to make contacts learn about United what with in those yeah she may draw some blood loss senses yeah we went on smallest on the galleries all senses next year based things again also why this so if you want to call it a group that she's got something to make those connections then right posted at the office yeah that's maybe more motivating kind of things do you need special stuff not just make this connection is great if you can make some money as well not least just the cycle not also what happened when we moved into our now last time good good cop comic what he's calling it now that almost ten years to the day old several twenty eleven to mid September twenty twenty moment moved out mission house right in the centre Newcastle is big Stockard at the time but with various points at one point I'll see those two other buildings within the same block tops you bridge agrees graces insult not one point one is the H. three hundred phones and other %HESITATION charitable organizations and that means much total commitment about you know sort of being a one of the ways Gostkowski's relevance unix also means connecting different communities points you got you have is not building models it was actually sent to the actual mix was not she not supported financially by anyone individual things like going to school to those of the organizations both arts and non arts organizations received the different cuts funding actually what we had actually we were neighbors yes we went together Mr will witness and these people but you know good bit more contract I'm just giving up says knocking on someone's door guideline do you want to do this yeah but what we did so when we talk I'm not buildings got the most basic level is that Chris and I also two three directors well now you say police initially but then you know con came to the mall hands off there's still so it's some kind of to the directions to the building beyond the mundane things that make sure you'll find it shocking things that I will say to me not that guy right jumble combines because an organization of some inventions machine in house he said that our older screen six point out he's involved is now working Seinfeld you know we reset we re well at that setting the gallery up now every guy he says we've got mix instead of these toll building will have either a nine floors in matching that now go different smaller sites around case at town center but I'm still a base serving as part of that system the store once you get this moving into focus becomes spread horizontally rather than vertically now I just as importantly there's not enough space because it was sort of time to walk track did you know I mean %HESITATION this is sort of an umbrella organization some people gone their own ways how to you can wait we try to stay in the house which really wasn't happening you notice more sets and guys have let's say a relate actually help him out on the road from where we were yes but then actually in some ways very different contexts so I mean we'll see how that pans out and sensible different things that will be that I say certainly expensive also found that I mean we all of this %HESITATION directs locus working unpaid basis for not not going be says it cut somebody's neck collars that we do sauce fresh environment program we do do that with offices that and again not at the office of each of the gallery there's some junk out of whatever project is we do all that kind of stuff number involved in running studios often moved lobbies cut boring mundane steps taken a number of stations a local woman dance stuff that actually is his pasta this is why sports thing we don't make a big song and dance about that yeah you start making big sometimes not realize when we have to meet you thanks how to more safety nets but I realized that people will realize can you others people didn't ask people didn't know about what was happening there some people again time for more late night conversations some people chose big role what was happening no not really it's not my circus you're not really interested in supporting artists despite it may be being that Joan yeah is it late but you know so why don't you know it looks about white to coach in the northeastern United well why did all three sessions what you got yeah I think certain people are just happy that's just an example of something wrong naturally the college she all she talked to she wore different unstuck thanks not make sense so despite beating around the bush not saying right now they should be yeah I miss the all different year groups but the conditions they should be more lexicon of the should be ball galleries is that you say and then I got out so it's about money not my fault not that great I should take that much money to be where I am well we will address the reports for the speaker to be thought somewhere else but that wasn't really well I mean I'll come on my mobile this Nixon said that means you can think of the city council thank blindly tried their best opus I would say what and because it already has consented remembering what was happening anyway I think it's not priority you know in the end the dice there were people that were meant to be used the people that lost their businesses because without meaning I was an inclusion such sports as much money into that since his neck item also union number what's that well my experience I have no problem further we have to be docked up there seems always to Dale and it was gonna happen one that mean a lot longer than we thought we were going to ask you so you're going to gas comes not with that is the building unless it's not it's actually that's real doubles more group will be people in the city including thank among Miami does every workable remember that we're going to shut down we have a site that will not someone's gonna resign business vice city cheats you get this long time dream ball that because I really want to I'm not interested in playing the game really in some ways it was years ago now he's got to you know if you look at what my house I'm TV's back in again passes Susman thank god because people make so we're at war right I checked your site not right when they say the new shopping on saying this is going to bring you know access city or what this cultural organization going night we bring next mountains the city people make things up not just the truth of it having said that will explain how to nominate me we've had a million pounds okay one day a lot of time not every single counterparts been spent within Newcastle I mean I thank my god you know that things are not is it what hasn't been retained in unison now about S. baby yes I but I still live in the house I'm left the city in protest we went very supportive right now I read a kite but I mean over time yeah and those of the old timey I took was not moment it came up with the people there so yes some people stay some people gone I bristle when I see sort of talking accounts not supporting market based things I've done I think that's the case well it's not my experience controversial subjects on that okay wildly denied by anyone the council the signet segments to help try and help you but you just send down vital options anyway yeah I think people remember certain sayings and we know what happens whatever they say that it's all been incredibly insightful I feel very lucky because I feel like this is being the moments where you both needed to see Brady reflects and get stuff off your chest so even just a little bit even if you could say everything you wanted to say but you've been guard is really gone and said yeah yeah I just really appreciate that you intend on searches every question I think I had as well J. either he has maybe any messages of hope she have any hope for the future of the arts and this that there will be some you know because coming from northern art ends I feel the pain of the arts community and the space above very arm's reach as well and people just have to get on a day in themselves use about experience and since its full year you're the pandemic that's my exceptional new stuff that people been left with let's go to the wrangling is already that says black people have been left in limbo yeah this afternoon but before you actually got to under yeah that's right which I mean I think it's difficult I mean it's gonna get us now when J. C. digital because in one way that we all love to sell my resilient and will find the right route you know when I say you got cut down for a bit let down the line string again with people like still not how bout that you know I'm wary of using the wiper is an object yeah %HESITATION narrative because oxalate it's also I feel I don't once rushing courage discipline exactly it %HESITATION because it's like Hey you should or even hold the %HESITATION wins or not students anyway oxalates talking itself now getting near cards or if you should be getting under the hound I will survive I don't have an ounce of possible to think where we are at the moment we society are the main things really impossible nothing is a bit of a rush to go down since I really don't you know I don't think really quite comprehend what's happened in the last two years nothing mean about what we'll see is about things that when you think you can pay the rent on Alton but it's also you know now I don't have that much of spiritual side but I think we've been through massively traumatic experience is traumatic about how we actually go forward and signed its government's descent it says that it's not safe for us and you know it's still long so Tyler thing to always sort of been through set next and a certain part of rebuilding and maintained over the last couple years but also trying to do things differently you know nothing I've been doing a little reading around this you know I think when I look to the pandemic look you know at this locale there's a lot of fights that in people resume writing that was so grim in so many ways couple spots take now because this is kind of going on yeah it's a lot of initiative builds up angst and so too I'm good things I'm not sure I don't know that we get this done and I come across that very dark here there's still a lot of actions to be taken if you're not gonna come out this data we went to the dangerous actually west nothing missing nothing all governments almost sort of contempt near all actually doing the right thing what you think I think I'm not saying the same thing which was but you know it's kind of like well well that's just about to start the choices remains lots of directions being given I think it's still quite low choices to be made about what she already how differently do do things how much we support sticking prostrate that trying to scramble by the law the biggest challenge in essence second mobile radio thing to society it's not just about %HESITATION will start up again sorry contracts last two years this is a whole different way of doing it all right and all the other things that happened with highlighted the not just Hockney at last year's use sitting around the table new residents yeah I got the biggest it look bigger debate stopped out students up to where we might stand in not you know we might represent you should strive represent we've always looked at it we can look at it as well great transsexuals different kinds of questions about their representation taken place recently in Glasgow is our reach not intense yeah what's being raised about what we can do is to be but you know still having some I think we've always felt that responsibility that's required to be jacks reported snag with possible dressing problem not solving the problems I think is not spontaneous I really as a bit of pressure sometimes try to make out the city saying not overnight well do ABC that we've dealt with us again it's an ongoing thing it's not set it up to people I solve problems the world because I was but you know it's that sort of taking responsibility we have a responsibility to be part of the process the moving forward so it just means doing things differently our typical it also thinking on that if I'm sounding a bit sort of not really sitting right next to it because I'm not trying to preempt how about my S. it's up to still very much work in progress but cannot you regional question there's responsibility on the sole individually collectively organizing institutional about trying to make things work in a doctor's it's not a foregone conclusion that will blast will stopping around plus the city still sort of come out of this terrible thing that's happened I feel like each month and double I'm optimistic I'm optimistic things aka struggle sometimes I mean things he also struggled without those struggling all times you know I recently yes I do actually despite how might come across remains optimistic otherwise I would get up and do something else United naturally you know this aside from the obvious and less competition and how to fight very hard out sheets you keep going and I've been working on we have been working with people I say we've lost if you were a whole life yeah to the extortionate but we'll save actually helps the artists and non artists now actually keep that business is going during this time so we still kind of dealing with keeping Garrett but yeah you know being open we need to change still making advocating a space to doing things in a different way because there's plenty of people with the same person sent consultations and not necessarily I mean that's always that's always been the case in Walmart they sent things imposed on you you have a choice the space is going to making about how you were dressed not really about you can take the easy route you can take box just put your head down money get on with life or you can challenge things you know and if you don't sex you can challenge inspired by director John things Weidenbach said stuff but you know also you can US just challenging just by doing stuff in a certain way again I'm trying not so just let me jump in the second lead by example I was reading pompous gone say that but just do stuff do you step inside this is good the choice got some up now join you later interest in trying to affect change or whether it's just a formative going into the art world there's lots of people there really informative changing I'm very safety that I think there's a lot of lip service going on the slope to consume I think the real thing that just needs to see or is this just this integrity I think we've got hacked we've got another the most liberal what people do and it's just going to see that actually come into play evil keep reading taking taking control of their own lives to take control of the situation take control of the development of this whatever you call it this ought to come cheap taking control of what's happening in the real integrity that's what's needed and what's what's happening when it's been more of a personal as I said well actually it's a about a negative point here but we also see we've got government is actually interfering more more Anne is less and less arms length yeah and there's a good night I'm not saying I'm doing it you know because less and less dependence %HESITATION condemning hasn't Beijing not help without yeah seeing all this last of the incentives contract to challenge this sort of interference and again subsumed under whether it's the same much talking and acting free not specific so much intense manhunts lake during this time the Sims talk or what did you do especially in the first locked down you know what you've got to talk with you watching you know watching so what does that you know all these people his script rices or whether you're just looking at pictures on the wall yeah yeah yeah that's L. my skill I got soul mates beginning to sort of be it was second also at a loss in the beginning and I think you did you need to keep saying not right now but we've got government which is not something crossed you still saying all subjects and not to send you also has a great capacity and also organize actions of responsibility in fact social change but I it being fake social worker yeah Mr job someone else will work with people that know what they're doing and meaningful life licensing for white tank do you tend to like tickets going outside is not going to change this not missing the conscious thing common look outside yourself look outside your immediate mind set which is coming challenging but it's challenging especially challenging when we've all been on the defensive thank you to your heart's Bible but this still held that's even I still believe I still believe in our yeah some really important messages I think that we need to reinforce I can't thank you enough both of you for all your time today Chris kitschy point people to words where they can find out more by the end the websites and that kind of thing we we we have to go to our website U. K. you'll find all sorts of things were videos of shares as well as exchange that we commissioned on our site to some options we have social media you can see with the kids Facebook the old people like us but we do need to do our goal yes sign galleries and galleries actual social Instagram twitch time with the kids you know coming soon noun okay even after baby at non white noise well they can just wishing you every best wish for what's to come in the coming year I really hope I can get to get salads and a few months and be busy Instagram SS and I mess I really miss fan I miss commercial union high so I spent a lot of time in our past and I miss it desperately so I just ready I'm so appreciative of both he taking so much time to talk to me sure thank you very much thank you

Women’s History Month

March marks women’s history month and International Women’s Day on the 8th, plus Mother’s Day in the UK this year on the 27th. Here’s a select playlist of Audiovisual Cultures episodes highlighting women’s history with topics including stardom, violence, activism, abortion rights and suffrage. Please comment with your further listening or reading suggestions on women’s history.